Immaculee Ilibigaza

Immaculée Ilibagiza was born in Rwanda and studied electronic and mechanical engineering at the National University. She lost most of her family during the 1994 genocide. Four years later, she emigrated to the United States and began working at the United Nations in New York City. She is now a full-time public speaker and writer. In 2007 she established the Left to Tell Charitable Fund, which helps support Rwandan orphans. Immaculée was awarded The Mahatma Gandhi International Award.

Transcript

And aloha and welcome to talk story the longest running talk show on Maui.

I am so thrilled to be here today and I have a very very special guest who I just adore calling in all the way from New York Immaculi Ilibigaza and aloha Immaculi how are you today?

Good aloha.

You have such an amazing story and we're so blessed to have a wonderful connection with Dr.

Wayne Dyer.

How did you first connect with Dr.

Wayne Dyer Immaculi?

You know I praise God for that connection since until now today.

So I met Wayne Dyer in New York and he was giving a talk about being fearless but I just met him online because I saw many people were going to this man and I didn't hear him talk actually because there were many speakers.

So but when he was outside people were just going to him and when they came out from meeting him I said they were laughing or crying and I started thinking what does he tell people what is this man.

So I went online and bought the book just really look like everybody because I just wanted to stand around him.

He signed my book and just like that he asked me where he came from where my accent he just said I want you I'm fine and I said where that accent comes from I told him and everything stopped right there.

Wow.

So he asked me if I know what happened to one guy I told him and he used to spend like a few seconds like just like there he asked me where's my parents where's my siblings if I was there and he asked me what I think you know it helped me strong I mean after two minutes we spoke we had the lion now making a circle around us and I remember he asked me have you thought about writing a book I have just finished the book three days before I remember putting it on it in an envelope printing it from my computer and asking God I have done my part let me see you do yours.

Wow and that was the seeds of how left to tell was written right?

Yeah three days later and I mean I have written it in my broken English in the way I could I have done my best but when I met him he was just like have you ever written a book and I couldn't tell him like I'm done the best I could so I told him when he started I told about that he's like wow call me when you finish you can find a way to tell people how you can be yourself I'm sure there is a reason and something depending here this is what I'm trying to teach people.

Wow well you know you have well it's an amazing story and I think I first heard about what happened to you in Rwanda in 1994 1994 I believe I first heard about it was it on 60 minutes it was some national tv story.

Yeah my goodness 60 minutes yesterday they did take me home to Rwanda and they spent they sent they hired somebody for a month to to find the lady who we're hiding with.

Wow.

They really went to 30.

Oh well in case people are listening and they don't know the whole story in 1994 you lost most of your family in that genocide that happened and you were in a bathroom a very small bathroom for 90 days while they were searching for you and you could hear them outside and you survived this and most of your family did not and there were how many people died in that genocide that happened in 1994 in Rwanda?

About a million.

A million?

Yeah more than a million died.

Wow wow and and so this was a life-changing event obviously but the backstory is you had this amazing connection to mother Mary and it's interesting because your background you studied electronic and mechanical engineering and a lot of people who who at the national university but a lot of times people who are fairly mental do not have that that I'd say that emotional connection to Mary so so how did that connection that you have to marry happen and how did it see you through in this this tragic situation?

Wow you speak about that actually children my body Mary had been just like my mother for forever you know my name is Immaculate actually my dad named me after our lady Mary so it's Immaculate conception as she said in Lourdes where actually when they have taken people to Minnesota who saw her then she told her she was immaculate.

Are you there?

Me after Mary.

Oh wow so I didn't realize that I think we lost her hopefully hopefully she'll call back we just lost our connection from New York I heard a little beep on the line I hope it's not her cell phone it sounded like the kind of sound you get when sometimes your your cell phone is running out of batteries but I will hopefully while we're waiting for her to call back I'm going to give you a little more of that backstory I mean she really believed in Mary and had this really deep connection to Mary and she prayed the rosary and she was there in this this tiny room ah good she's back yay you're back I thought it sounded like your phone might have lost its battery so I was hoping um so I'm glad you're back I was just saying how you prayed the rosary in this bathroom yes I love the rosary all my life I mean it is just this beautiful way to speak to Mary and just to have a woman as a mother you know who understand your program I feel her I completely feel her around me so during the genocide I prayed the rosary all the time from morning until night anything really if I can put in a few words if I'm here is because I try I pray that prayer when I was praying it wasn't just memorizing words and saying them I felt like she was just saying mean every word you know there's sometimes in life when you start to pray and you don't even know how to pray anymore there's no words that makes sense and sometimes it's much better to borrow the word of somebody else the rosary is put together already and it is positive it's beautiful is it I always say thank god for whoever who put it together it was in a good state of mind because you're praying when you're already at peace and then somebody like me who was all over who you know I thought of praying to kill the killers was a good thing and you know because they were the bad guys so when you want that state of mind you just don't know what to say what to do anymore so when I said the rosary I feel like she was holding my hand holding my hand and teaching me teaching me how to talk say our father even if they're bad god is still the father of everybody even if you're doing wrong he's still their father and think of them as brothers who have been wrong terribly wrong bad but don't hate them in a way that you don't think that they have any relation with you so that they're like really they kind of be the children of god we're doing this so but you have to accept it because the belief or faith the month that the things you accept you know and and when you do it feels better it feels like truth you know she really made me when you get to realize yeah when you you say you feel her presence all around you and you felt like her holding your hand how does that actually feel do you feel like spirits coming can you describe how that feels what did he say when you feel her presence when you feel mary all around you and you felt her holding your hand it's interesting because of meditation sometimes I felt that I've been asked to actually reach out my hand to her and I've been guided that and I I thought that was unusual because I don't always hear that you know um and and and how did you feel when you felt that she was holding your hand or all around you you know wow I wish I can find words that make sense you know to express that it is like it's not a rush like all of a sudden it's so big changes but it's such a stillness it's a peaceful feeling then you of love that you know that you know that just overcome you and it's there and and and the feeling is the understanding that she's holding your hand is there very clearly you know another position I remember I took at least you're talking about almost taking it physically but it's not physical I remember feeling like I was laying down on her lap and I feel like her hands were over my head but they were searching for us it was a lot of fear and I feel like her hand was over my head and she just like I'm here continue to pray love them and pray for protection did you are in my hands did you want me to yeah wish the good for everybody including even those who are doing bad don't wish them back don't leave them in the hands of evil pray them out of the hands of the evil pray for them to change wow it's unbelievable did you did you really feel you were gonna die were there times I mean because I could see a day maybe two days three days but I mean it was 90 days wasn't it nine no three months in and you didn't leave that bathroom no no you know it isn't so funny and I knew you can there's no one day there's no one hour we ever stayed in that bathroom and thinking today we are going to be okay no one day and yet deep down those feelings again you kind of put together it was almost like something was was telling me not now not now you're not dying now another day but not now and I kept telling God in my heart no no please don't let it happen now I can die another day but not now well it must have been terrible because after you finally did get free how did that come about and it must have been a very hard feeling of knowing that you survived and so many in your family and so many others died yes I did the way we came out we find out that the government have the one that was killing have run away from the country and the Buddha people from my tribe from the other tribe they captured the capital that's how we knew we could have came out it was safe however you're right coming out finding out I mean everybody I left behind in my home was killed my two brothers my mom and dad my grandma my grandpa but life took another meaning I didn't feel like I survived because I was better I didn't feel like I survived because I prayed better I just felt like my journey was not over and I remember my brother was so scared of dying one of the later he wrote to me the day before they killed him I put in the book left to tell as a copy exactly as he wrote his handwriting I'm remembering them in in a letter he said if I die do not worry because I'm prepared and I'm thinking my brother accepting this he said I think I'm leaving I'm going but do not worry even the man who was hiding him he said when your brother kept looking at me we'll pray and then he will say my friend I think this is my time so suddenly in his heart God made him feel that was okay and he told me if I die don't work with heaven I'm prepared for that all I know is that no one tribe can exterminate another it is not the will of God so my brother was very open about that then I'm thinking and then what I thought after why the feeling I'm not dying was there for me and why are the people who were begging for dying and yet I suffered I mean I went in the bathroom I was 115 pounds I came out 65 pounds 65 pounds every bone was out well that people people haven't seen you you're very tall lady how tall are you immaculate oh I am 5 9 5 9 and you were 65 I can't even believe you could have survived you but were you getting food from the the preacher it was a person who was taking care of you right did he was able to bring food into you yes he was able to give us food but the food he could afford was the left of all those children it would be eight to make a bitch in one plate among eight people and that is if he could bring that wow there were eight there were eight of you eight of you in the bathroom there was mess and waiting to be killed every day it was even more drying my body more than anything yeah more than lacking food so you had one plate of food for eight of you in the bathroom if you could get that for 90 days eight of you in the and the bathroom was how what was the size of the bathroom immaculate three by four feet three by four feet oh my gosh well that's that's tiny tiny and and so so when you wrote left to tell discovering god amidst the Rwanda and holocaust it was it must have been in a way all of the the the gratitude of surviving but also for the grace of really honoring the the blessing that Mary gave you and that you were able to survive with and on top of that you started left to tell charitable fund which which helps to support Rwandan orphans yeah definitely the bulk was I I'm left the territory of the such a heroes of life people who who died innocently at the hand of people who don't love you know and then I think this like to honor our lady my mother Mary who protected me and and we're still I feel I feel it's like after the most celebrated say oh so you are no fun I'm like enough fun I don't feel so I think like my mother Mary staying with me she's still seeing me when I'm sleeping it doesn't feel like a thought she's ever gone and I feel her affection through the rosary I pray it and I really get anything I ask for I ask her for a friend if I need a girlfriend to talk to as she comes so I never felt alone and that was the same when we I founded it the left to tell foundation at the with the help of her house you know they're like you want to help people because it doesn't look like it's for you alone as you say like of course I do and like we can help you when it was the beginning I didn't know how you make a foundation then I start and I would I just want to be able to to give a hand to the person who is still in those problems and and and it was through Hay House that this book became a huge huge bestseller and you became someone who was able to go around the world talking I believe you even met the pope right I do this book meaning when they who really was the horror catalyzer who introduced me to Hay House who convinced them who convinced me without knowing me yeah at the time he called me he said you think your parents are pushing me you know like I don't understand why I don't even know remember you but somehow I don't sleep I want you to start to be told so I'm like when whatever you do just want me to follow your heart I only know a good person that's all anyhow he gave it to the house Hay House was really passionate about that went behind it financially with people everybody I mean they went out of their way and the world just received it since 2006 when the book came out I've been traveling to this day every single week I was speaking somewhere two or three times a week wow and and you've been writing too because you did write the book the rosary I wrote about seven books since then seven books and and there was a book you wrote called the boy who met Jesus and what was that how did you happen to I can't tell you how happy I am that you have known those two books because they are my favorite the lady of Kibbeho the rosary and the boy who met Jesus and I don't know about Our Lady of Kibbeho can you tell me I have no idea who that what that is when I saw a lady of Kibbeho marry my our mother you know how she visit people I can't say it when they have taken the people to to Lourdes where they have seen Mary you know about that yes Our Lady Mary appeared in a place called Kibbeho in Rwanda I didn't know that she did and after years of investigation and when I talk about investigation the church want to destroy it they don't want to accept it but when they see there's no way this is they don't it doesn't add nothing to the catholic church apparition because we believe what we believe already so when something like that happened it attracts millions of people they just want to dismiss all this craziness but when she appears and they do investigation and they approved it it really means we have checked every single word we have checked those who said they saw her is true they really saw a supernatural human from heaven wow she appeared in 1981 one of the things she spoke about was tears to the children she saw in high school she told them she told them a genocide was coming she said the genocide was coming and she she warned them she warned the whole country and when she she saw them she saw them outside people would come thousands hundreds of hundreds of people would come to hear them and she what I love and why I wrote the book she said I'm not just warning you it's coming and I'm not saying it's coming I'm trying to tell you what to do to avoid it and one of the things for to do was love one another forgive one another help one another be good to one another if you do my children pray pick up your rosaries talk to me talk to god let me guide your heart in the right part if you do this would not happen if you don't this is what is coming she showed the children people killing each other she did wow wow and children who saw they will be screaming mother this can never happen here no she saw the whole thing in front of us but we didn't see it but the kids three kids who saw her they saw everything wow and and so that's even harder to accept because there was this and and and nothing was done and nothing was done but now everybody was saying well maybe who knows it from heaven and she said okay my children don't believe it's from heaven but just believe in goodness believe in love I'm just awakening you up because if you don't there's not much time left well and we felt you you you have been the ambassador for that story and for the people of Rwanda and able to give back and you did get the Mahatma Gandhi international award of reconciliation and peace and who would have ever have guessed from that bathroom that tiny tiny bathroom with eight people 90 days there well everyone around you is being killed that that you would be able to give back so much and it's a very gracious wonderful lady who just exudes love thank you oh thank you so much in you too you do such a great job well it's it's an honor to speak to you I'm so glad we had this time so thank you so much for your time Immaculate I I look forward to seeing you that weekend okay I will tell you about the second time the boy who met is an amazing story yes yes so god bless you and a big from Maui to you a big Aloha