Overcoming social anxiety.
How often is it that we feel we must impress others?
We must expose ourselves as an image of goodness,
Badness,
Success,
Failure towards society,
Whatever it is.
How often do we make an expectation for ourselves based upon what others might think of us,
Based upon a fear really of being rejected,
Of being sidelined and not included.
This is what for this practice we're going to call social anxiety.
This kind of itchy feeling,
This fearfulness of interacting with new people,
New situations and projecting our fears,
Projecting our expectations upon them.
So what we will do in this practice is liberate ourselves from these narratives,
Liberate ourselves from these sticking points and come back into our happy,
Spontaneous and playful selves,
Into the self that is able to relax and make the most of any social situation.
So to begin now,
I invite you to take a couple of deep breaths in through the nose and out through the nose.
And we're really going to be slowing the breath down now.
Deep,
Slow breaths.
Finding a stillness in the body.
Relaxing the face.
Relaxing tension,
Perhaps in the shoulders and the neck.
Just finding this moment of stillness with yourself.
Observing or noticing any thoughts or any busyness in the mind.
And just treating it as you would any like any noise,
Like anything passing by.
You just say,
Hey,
There's a thought and let it kind of fade into the background.
So you're kind of focusing on these empty moments.
Into the stillness,
Into the infinite stillness.
See if you can channel your breath into that.
Letting go just a little bit more with each exhale.
So you're using the exhale to really relax into,
Really reassure yourself.
Really surrender into this infinite stillness.
Noticing any activity in the mind,
Any thoughts,
Any sensations in the body.
And just letting them pass by as you continue to breathe,
As you continue to surrender into this space.
And in this contemplative space,
I invite you to think about or to feel what social anxiety means to you.
Identify with a feeling sensation,
The emotion,
The sensation of feeling constricted.
Feeling fearful to interact with other people.
Feeling fearful to say yes to new and perhaps unknown opportunities.
The tightness that you may hold in preserving your image,
In preserving what you feel you must live up to.
So just let these words kind of run by you and trigger any feelings,
Emotions associated with this.
And in this safe space,
Allow yourself to feel these,
Allow yourself to be vulnerable and let these emotions,
Just as the thoughts before,
Bubble up and pass by.
Let them filter through your body.
Taking a slightly deeper inhalation through the nose and an exhalation through the mouth.
And once again,
Now,
Again,
Contemplate this same kind of behavioral pattern that you may relate to in terms of impressing others,
In terms of feeling what they might think,
In terms of how you appear in your social groups and your culture.
And again,
Just invite into the equation any emotion,
Any related sensation connected to this.
Using the breath as your tool,
Feel you can really breathe through that emotion.
Give it a life that can be outside of you.
And with each exhale,
Releasing any thing left,
Releasing any identification with this that has arisen.
Perhaps bringing your awareness to your heart,
Bringing your awareness to your chest.
Perhaps placing your hand on your heart or your chest.
And just releasing it again.
And feeling that as you surrender,
As you breathe away and discard what no longer serves you,
You can connect to a sense of presence in your heart,
A sense of proximity to this moment.
And perhaps there's a very subtle movement,
A very subtle sensation that lives for you here in the heart,
Of warmth,
Of compassion,
Of care.
Another more easy nature.
So just breathe into the resonance,
Breathe into the sensation that these words provoke.
And allow that spontaneous you to really feel your body.
So starting in your heart,
Allow that spontaneous you to grow with your breath,
Expand out into the chest.
Down your spine,
Supporting you,
Hugging your whole back and lower back.
Up the front of your body,
Feeling again that sensation growing through your stomach,
Lifting up through your neck,
Filling the back of your head,
The back of your eyes,
Really completing you.
Breathe into this spontaneous you,
Now expanding even greater into your arms and legs.
Perhaps slightly touching your fingers and wiggling your toes and feeling that you can embody this energy,
This sense of presence and life force.
And as you embody this life force feel you can project it out into the world,
Out into your future,
Out into your interactions with people,
Socially,
In business,
In close family relationships,
In whatever way it is,
Feel that you can be this great,
Loving,
Playful you.
A you that doesn't need to please in hope for the approval of others,
But instead honours and takes delight in its own nature,
In its own self and expression of that.
Taking a deep inhalation through the nose and just letting go of everything through the mouth.
Bringing your hands to your heart once again,
Taking a moment to thank yourself for this practice,
To honour the spontaneous and loving you.
And as well to honour the obstacles,
The anxieties,
The difficulties and social challenges that really help us point towards who we really are.
Thank you.
Namaste.
