Overcoming The 'I Can't Meditate' Mentality

Have you ever thought "I can't meditate"? I hear this all the time, and I understand, because meditation can be really difficult in the beginning. In this talk, I discuss my journey with meditation, and how when we simplify the process, we find the deepest results. Why do we meditate? And what does it mean to meditate? It doesn't have to be hard. It can be as simple as taking 3 deep breaths. Listen to this talk to be inspired on your journey of accessing more peace, love and joy.

Transcript

I can't meditate.

I don't know how many times I've heard that,

But I heard it a lot.

And often it's my prescription to people to try meditation,

To give them that support that they need,

That assistance to align with their highest version of self,

To find happiness,

Joy,

Presence,

Peace.

All of those become so much more clear and accessible through the process of meditation.

But there's difficulty.

I think there's difficulty for everyone,

Especially when you're starting out.

And it's the mind.

It's the mind.

We've given all of our power to our mind.

We've relinquished control to the mind,

To our thoughts,

And it's become the be-all-end-all.

And it's just not fair.

It's not fair to the other systems of our body,

To the other awarenesses that we do hold,

Our heart consciousness,

What a beautiful awareness stemming from love,

Always at peace and always trying to pull us deeper to that truth,

That oneness,

That shared commonality between humanity,

That we are all seeking the same things,

To be loved and accepted,

To live a life of joy,

And to find inner peace.

We're all on that same path and when we tune into the awareness of the heart,

We get to feel that like,

Oh,

Okay,

I'm not the only one.

We're kind of all in the same boat here.

And then we have our deepest awareness.

We can call it the soul truth or the higher self,

The inner knowing.

But what it comes down to is it's not something that's separate from you.

It's a piece of you.

It's a part of you.

And this deepest part of you is really smart,

Really wise.

They get it.

They can see the whole picture and they can see this part of you.

It just always sees that life is just an experience and everything that's happening to us are experiences.

And from this seat of the witness,

We get to watch it unfold and not be pulled into it,

Not be dragged down by it.

Meditation helps us access this part of our being,

This part that is really all knowing and can see that,

You know,

Yes,

There are highs and lows,

But it is all in perception.

It is all really a choice when it comes down to it,

How we want to perceive life.

And that we,

We have a lot more control and say than we think we do.

We get pulled into our environment and the chaos of the world,

But there's a part of us that knows that's really a choice.

How we feel on the inside,

That's up to us and no one else.

So when you say,

I can't meditate,

What I'm hearing is I can't access this awareness within me,

This all knowing part of myself that is at peace.

Peace is usually the biggest thing we're looking for with meditation,

But for some people it's that journey to more joy.

And for some people it's connecting to more love.

But let's just say right now I'm going to focus on peace.

All three of those are accessible for sure through meditation,

But peace really takes that pressure off the mind and creates a spaciousness to let us know we're not under pressure 24 seven or not in the hamster wheel that we can just be,

Don't have to do and create and think we can actually just sit and be with what is.

So the reason we're having this difficulty is because we don't know how to get to this awareness or we think it's this thing that's outside of us that's so far away and all we can see are our thoughts.

All we can see is that mental state that we've functioned from our entire lives,

That we've given so much power to that we don't know how to disconnect,

How to surrender that control,

To relinquish it and to give the power to that inner knowing.

It's like passing the talking stick,

Taking it from the mind that's like me,

Me,

Me,

Me,

Me.

Focus on me,

Listen to me.

I'm here to protect you and save you and I'm here to measure and judge your past experiences to protect you in your future.

I'm here to look ahead and see all possible opportunities,

Choices and possible struggles that are coming your way.

I'm going to let you know about all of those and I'm going to think about it day and night.

I'm going to process it in and out.

All of this information.

I'm your one tool that you have and to get by in this world,

You need me.

I'm all you need and that's where the lie comes in.

Yes,

Of course our mind is useful and powerful in protecting us at times that we need and helping us figure things out but do we need to be there 24-7?

Really?

It's draining.

It's exhausting.

Something in our body is telling us this isn't healthy.

We're experiencing less joy because we can't have gratitude for this moment because we're processing the past and we're predicting the future.

So it's pulling us away from this beautiful life that's right in front of us which is why we need to disempower the mind just a little bit.

Just knock it off that podium and bring it down a few notches because it's been taking away from what is rightfully yours.

Your joy,

Your peace and your love.

Those big important things that we're all seeking which are right here,

Right now,

Right in front of us but the mind is just blocking your ability to connect to those things.

Maybe not all the time but definitely a lot of the time it's taking away.

Taking away your power to connect to these beautiful truths which is why we need meditation and I don't want you to get discouraged when I use the word meditation.

I'm not saying sitting in silence for an hour.

Maybe it's sitting in silence for one minute.

Maybe it's taking three deep breaths.

When I started out that's all I could do.

Three deep breaths.

I was riddled with anxiety and depression and it was suggested to me to just stop and go out to a window,

Take some deep breaths.

Three deep breaths.

It was specific.

It was perfect.

It was all I needed.

At that time it was all I could do because my mind had all of the power,

All of the control.

I was working full time and I was a full time student in a distance program and boy was my mind busy and really in that fear vibration.

I felt like I had to work day and night just to be enough,

Just to get by.

And when I would stop at work in between clients I'd go to the window,

Take those three deep breaths.

Something happened in those moments.

Something that I experienced to this day if I'm doing an hour long meditation.

I still get that taste of it in those three deep breaths.

What happens is I'm pushing everything that's on my plate.

I'm putting it to the side and I'm saying right now all I'm doing is focusing on my breath.

And that's okay.

I don't have to be in the hamster wheel.

I don't have to be this idea of perfect or productive.

I can just be.

And I knew that it was healthy for me because it felt good.

I began to start unwinding.

I began to start seeing the value in just focusing on my breath.

Moving from three breaths to five breaths to 20 breaths.

Counting my breaths.

Focusing on my breaths.

Yes,

I was still activating my mind because I was counting and I was focusing on something.

But to just focus on your breath and not the list of a thousand things that we've laid out for ourself and our life and the things that we want to process and let go of and the things that we need to do in the next five minutes,

Five days,

Five years.

To just give it a break and focus on your breath.

What a gift.

That is meditation.

I don't care if anyone thinks it's not.

It is.

Yes,

The plate is not empty but I'm moving from a plate where I can't see the bottom to just having like one little green pea on the plate.

It's really the closest thing to silence.

The spaciousness that we can find to allow us the opportunity to start connecting to our truth.

And I find still to this day the breath is one of the most powerful practices.

There's body scans.

There's vipassana styles.

I do a lot of chakra meditations.

That's my jam.

That's what I love doing.

But when I focus on just the breath,

Still the most powerful because the breath is life.

The breath is happening in this moment.

It's occurring.

We're not focusing on no saying or trying to find something.

It's right here.

It's physical.

It's palpable.

It's easy to focus on.

And anyone can do it.

It's always here.

And when we focus on the breath,

It begins to calm and slow.

And when it's slow,

So does our nervous system.

So does anxiety.

So does pressure.

Things begin to soften.

Our body functions more normally with ease,

With flow.

Our fluids,

Our blood,

Our tissues begin to move in the way that they're meant to move because our breath is what feeds them.

So there's a little bit more to that practice of just focusing on our breath than one may think.

So when you say,

I can't meditate,

My question to you is,

Well,

Can you breathe?

And obviously you can or you wouldn't be listening to this right now.

So can you breathe?

Okay.

You can meditate.

If you can breathe,

Bring your awareness to your breath.

Yes,

Your mind will still operate and try and pull you outside of that focus to your breath.

Doesn't matter.

Just come back to the breath.

The issue is that we start to feed the thoughts as they come in.

We start to feed them and nourish them and begin this storyline in our mind pulling us away from the moment,

From the present moment.

But the breath is like a metronome,

Constantly flowing at a consistent pace.

It's always there.

It's always breathing.

So keep coming back to that.

It's very simple.

And eventually,

Eventually it will happen and it does happen.

The thoughts begin to slow or fade or soften.

I don't think they ever completely stop.

Yes,

We can have those moments of stoppage,

But you know,

It's kind of important,

The thinking process.

But in the meditation,

When you're focusing on your breath and your thoughts are coming,

It's actually really empowering to disempower the thoughts.

Not judge yourself for having the thoughts.

It's human.

It's normal.

It's something you've been doing your whole life.

It's going to take some time for them to start slowing down.

But as a thought arises,

Just seeing,

Oh,

There's a thought and I'm going back to my breath.

Simple.

We're not feeding it.

We're coming back to the breath.

So I invite you to take three deep breaths with me.

And as we are breathing together,

If a thought arises,

It's all good.

Just come back to the breath.

Thank you for sharing this time with me.

You can meditate and you have been for a long time.

Namaste.

Reviews

Great to revisit when you are feeling you can't do it - Carrie has a way of breaking things down simply and settling your spirit. She is my current fav 🌞

Wonderful. Simple guidance from Carrie make it much easier for someone like me and my monkey mind to slow down and focus.

What a refreshing message and spurit. Well produced too. Thank you.

Great reminder and guidance

Makes sense - Namaste 🙏

Thank you for simplifying the process, Carrie! As an overthinking being, this helps - so much!

Absolutely brilliant Carrie!
💗✨🙏

Thanks

I was looking for a good and clear way to introduce meditating to a friend. Thank you for keeping it simple while still saying what is supportive.

Thank you 💚🙏

Great reminder that any of us can meditate (even if we don't think we can!). :) Loved the idea to just look out the window & take some breaths! Thank you (as usual!), Carrie!

Helpful for sure! Don't expect an 11min meditation, as that's not the purpose. Carrie has a wonderful, soothing voice too!

Thank you for this short, beautifully concise and so reassuring talk. I’ve been meditating for some time and sometimes I have my moments of self doubt, yet this holds my hand and guides me back.

Wonderful. Thank you. 🙏

Beautiful talk. This was very encouraging for me. Thank you. 🙏

Beautiful thank you

Thank you. I will share this with my friends who are saying they can't meditsate. 🙏✨💖

Thank you for helping us to manage expectations!! I especially like the apt description of the monkey mind. Namaste for three breaths!! 🙏🏻😊

Great Talk Tuank you