Welcome to this meditation on self-compassion and toughening the inner critic.
To help us arrive,
Let's begin with three gentle breaths.
Nice gentle inhale,
Filling the lungs.
Nice big gentle exhale.
Again,
Nice big inhale.
And on the exhale,
Release anything your body no longer desires to hold.
One more breath in.
Filling the lungs and releasing with a nice long sigh.
If you're here,
Chances are there's a voice in your head that's been pretty harsh lately.
A voice that tells you you're not doing enough,
That you're falling behind,
That you should be further along by now.
And that voice sounds like it's protecting you,
Pushing you to be better.
But really,
It's just all programming,
Old code,
That learned to criticize you into performing.
Here's what you need to know.
There's nothing wrong with you.
You don't need fixing.
And you certainly don't need to be beaten into shape by your own thoughts.
For the next few minutes,
We're going to practice something radical.
Treating yourself with the same kindness you'd offer someone you love.
First,
Just notice if the inner critic is present right now.
What is it saying?
Maybe it's judging how you look,
Or criticizing a decision you made,
Or telling you you're not enough in some way.
Just listen to it without believing it.
Hear the words like you're overhearing someone else's conversation.
Now here's the important part.
You are not that voice.
You are the one who notices it.
The critic is just a pattern,
A learned response.
It's been running for so long it feels like the truth.
But it's not.
It's just old code.
And just like any code,
You can choose to not run it anymore.
Now,
Let's soften towards yourself.
Place one hand on your heart,
And feel the warmth there.
Take a deep breath,
And imagine you're speaking to a younger version of yourself.
What would you say?
You wouldn't be harsh.
You'd be gentle.
You'd say,
You're doing your best.
It's okay.
I see you.
I've got you.
Now say that to yourself right now.
Not as a performance.
Just as truth.
I'm doing my best.
It's okay.
I've got me.
If the critic tries to jump back in with a yeah but,
Just notice it.
And let it pass.
Don't argue with it.
Don't give it energy.
Just come back to the softness.
Feel your breath.
Feel your heartbeat.
This is you.
Alive.
Here.
Trying.
You don't have to earn kindness.
You don't have to perform your way into being worthy of gentleness.
You already are.
Keep your hand on your heart.
Keep breathing.
Let yourself be held by your own presence.
Now let's choose a new way of relating to yourself.
Instead of criticism,
What if you met yourself with curiosity?
Instead of judgment,
What if you offered understanding?
Feel what it would be like to move through your day without that harsh voice running in the background.
To make a mistake and simply think,
Okay,
What can I learn from this?
Instead of,
I'm such an idiot.
That version of you isn't far away.
It's right here.
Available in this moment.
You just have to choose it.
Choose kindness.
Choose gentleness.
Choose to be your own safe place.
The inner critic will show up again.
Possibly today.
Maybe even in the next few minutes.
And when it does,
You'll know what to do.
You don't believe it.
You choose kindness towards yourself instead.
Each time you do this,
The code or the old programming loses power.
Not because you've fought it,
But because you've stopped feeding it.
Take one more deep breath in.
Nice,
Long,
Big exhale.
You are not broken.
You don't need fixing.
You are already complete and whole.
All you need is your own gentleness.
