Let Go Of Your Control

We spend so much time and especially energy, worrying. Trying to control whatever we can, in order to feel safe. The problem being, that it exhausts us and even worse - we become good at what we practice. And worrying is not a great thing to become good at. Let's practice letting go of the control and gain peace, love, acceptance. This doesn't mean that we should not act, but let's act on the things that we can do something about and accept the things that we can not. Thanks for practicing with me!

Transcript

Hmm.

Losing control.

Losing control is so difficult and it can be terrifying to let go of it.

Not because we know what will happen if we do so,

But our emotions,

Our body,

Our mind,

It tells us that we need to stay in control.

But what's so crazy is that we use so much energy being in control and one of the symptoms of needing to be in control is all the worrying.

There might be new studies,

But this study was just quite a few years old.

I was surprised,

But thinking of it afterwards and noticing my own level of worrying,

I wasn't at all surprised about the result of that study.

But the study showed that only 2% out of 100% of our worries become real.

Only 2%.

And furthermore,

When those 2% arise and our worries do become real,

It only or it works the best if we handle it in a rational way,

Not in an emotional way.

And usually when we worry,

It's mainly emotional and then we try mentally to deal with it.

But we just continue that cycle of ruminating on the worries.

What if this happened?

What if he says that or she says that or what if I don't catch the plane or what if there's not food enough or what about the bills?

So it's quite natural.

The reason is simple.

Our brain is a survival brain.

It's there to make sure that we survive.

The other main thing is to reproduce.

People first,

Reproduction later.

So our mind is primarily,

Or it is the primary function is to make sure that we survive.

So worrying is good.

It makes us survive.

The thing is that we're not living in the savanna anymore.

We are,

You know,

I mean,

We just need to look at our worries and see how many of our worries have really become real and how do we deal with it.

So this meditation is about wanting to,

Desiring to lose control,

Wanting to lose control so that we can experience more peace,

Be worry free,

Experience more presence with the ones that we love and have so much more energy in our system because worrying consumes energy.

And our brain is,

Our brain draws around 64 percent of all the glycosis in our body,

Which means that our brain function is,

It's the one that uses most energy.

And if we have a worrying mind,

Well,

Yeah,

It's obvious.

We use more energy.

So it makes sense to use the breathing,

Use our sentences to create some steps getting closer to not worrying that much,

Accepting what we cannot do anything about and dealing with what we can do something about.

So let's get settled.

Let's get comfortable.

And just start noticing your in-breath and noticing your out-breath.

And also notice the level of energy in your body.

Maybe it's low,

High,

Medium.

Let's take some deep breaths and get ready to do some work.

Practicing understanding,

Having fun.

And to create a small smile on your lips,

It definitely helps in all this learning,

Especially if it's stuff that for part of us isn't really that comfortable,

Losing control.

So the first step is on the in-breath.

And we're going to be working with prolonged in-breath and prolonged out-breath.

So what we will do is that on our in-breath,

We'll just do a long prolonged in-breath,

No sentence.

But under out-breath in the first set,

We will use the sentence,

I wish to let go of my control.

And do remember that any sentence that I use,

You can change it.

If it feels like there's another sentence or words that work better for you,

Just please do go ahead and change it.

So we'll do a long in-breath and a long out-breath.

And under out-breath,

We'll use the sentence,

I wish to let go of my control.

Okay,

Let's go ahead.

Long in-breath and under out-breath,

I wish to let go of my control.

I wish to let go of my control.

I wish to let go of my control.

I wish to let go of my control.

I wish to let go of my control.

So just as many as you can say just inside of you.

And we'll just continue in silence for three more in and out-breaths.

And the last one.

All right.

Do remember that if you feel dizzy from doing deep breathing,

Just slow down.

Take the foot off the gas and put it on the brake.

This next set will do the same,

But we will move the sentence to the in-breath.

So on the in-breath,

I wish to let go of my control.

And under out-breath,

We will use the sentence so that I can experience more peace,

More presence,

More love.

These three words,

It's completely up to you whether you want to use those words.

And I do recommend just to be very creative,

Open to whatever words arise.

These are just my words.

The intention is to have the consciousness about control and the consequences,

Be aware about the consequences of the control by desiring something else,

More peace,

More letting go,

More love,

More presence.

So we'll do one deep in-breath,

Long prolonged and one out-breath where I just do the,

I remember I will tell you what the sentence is and then we'll go into three breaths where we'll just do it in silence.

So let's start with the first one.

So on our in-breath,

I wish to let go of my control.

Out-breath so that I can experience more peace,

Love,

Presence,

Calm.

And then now continue with three more breaths and just take your time,

Do it in your own tempo,

Do it in your own speed.

So let's start now.

All right.

So let's just sit for a bit,

Just in silence,

Just being with what is,

Being with the experience of the deep breathing,

The desire,

The wish to let go of control so that we can experience more peace,

Love,

Kindness,

Stillness or whatever is in your system.

All right?

I really just sink into it,

Just be with whatever is.

For this short period of time everything is about you,

What you want.

Alright,

So what I would recommend you to do and challenge you to do is for the rest of the day.

The thing with control is that if we are not conscious about it,

We are not conscious about it.

But meditation can help us to start just recognizing contraction.

Contraction is when our nervous system starts to contract,

Our breathing becomes more shallow,

We tighten up in our mind,

Our emotions.

And what you can notice when the contraction arises,

Or you can be aware of the contraction arising by you getting a bit irritated,

A bit angry,

Or you feel hurt.

Just noticing that and you know it's meditation time.

It's time to do your life on the spot,

Long in-breaths.

I really want to lose control.

Let go of my control,

I really want to let go of my control.

Not meaning that you should go all crazy,

Start yelling,

But meaning that just let go of it and just lean into the letting go so that you can experience more peace,

More honesty in regards to what's actually going on.

In many of these situations we can actually just tell the person,

You know what,

That really hurt.

Could we just take a time out,

Just 10 minutes for me to find out what's going on inside of me because I don't want to go into anger.

That's enough for that person to stop because they might be so accustomed to you reacting in another way.

Doing that you will create more love inwards,

More acceptance.

It might be that you need to confront emotions or cry or be with other type of emotions,

But from a health perspective doing that is so much better than being mad,

Irritated,

Creating the contraction.

The expansion is what we want in our system.

I do hope that all of this makes sense.

You're always welcome to write a comment and ask me questions or on the live events on Inside Time just to ask the questions there and I'll do my very best to share what I think.

Let's just please remember that I'm on the same path as you are.

I'm no expert.

I've done this for many,

Many,

Many years.

It doesn't make me an expert.

It just means that I've come across things that work for me that I'm sharing with you,

But I love to get inspired by,

For example,

What you share or what other people share.

Let's just be at the same level,

Human beings trying to figure out how to have as great a life as possible.

Thank you so much.

I really appreciate you being there.

I feel you even though you're not in front of me.

I feel you.

Thank you so much.

That's just it.

Thank you so much.

Bye.

Reviews

Thank you so much. I have known I have issues of control, but I haven’t linked that to how it impacts my ability to experience more love, joy, peace, calm and presence in my life. I understand that now 🙏🏻💜

I am working towards Letting go of control in as many areas of my life as possible💗. I am grateful to hear this reminder 🙏🏼

Super authentic and nurturing. This was a wonderful meditation and soothing to the nervous system. Thank you. 🙏🏼❤️

Tack!🌸

I can feel the shift. And wow. I want more. 🧡

Always a heartful helper, Carlos 💓

So much rage in me. Need to do this everyday.constantly flooding… thank you

I love your authentic way of speaking and guiding us through this practice. It was a heart-opening experience for me and I will definitely come back to this practice throughout my day. I could totally relate to your description of contraction and expansion in my everyday life. That is something I have been practising with for a while now and you inspired me to keep going and explore it even further. Thank you so much 💛🙏

So powerful and unique - I don’t think I’ve ever done this exercise before but I loved it!

Felt lovely energy from Carlos...like talking to a friend very uplifting and down to earth 🌎

Such a lovely meditation thank you. You have a very lovely voice and sense of humour and kept it very real. I look forward to listening to you more. Thank you 🙏

This was so wonderful. Very helpful. Thank you! 🙏🏻

Loved the personal speaking.

Brilliant 🙏🌹

Beautiful and compassionate. Helped me see that letting go leads to allowing other greater things

this was very helpful, thank you 🙏

That was amazing! Thank you!

This was a unique, pleasant, very insightful and inspirational meditation. I appreciate your genuineness and humanity. Thank you! ☮ ❤😌🙏

My awareness of living so contracted has me searching for ways to release. And telling myself to lighten up has been ineffective and frustrating. This exercise is a good starter tool for calming. Thanks for your guidance and interaction with us along this path 🙏

Lovely way of relating to your audience. Very personable. Great meditation. Thank you