How I'm Moving Past Resistance

In this episode, I am sharing some major realness about what's been going on in my life and what's been causing me to feel so much resistance and unworthiness. I'm also sharing the one thing that you can do to move past the resistance and step into your own damn power! Please note that this talk does contain explicit language and is not suitable for children.

Transcript

Hey guys,

Just a fair warning before you dive in that this podcast does contain explicit language.

Hey guys,

So I'm excited to come on the podcast today and share a little realness with you about how I've been feeling lately and what's been coming up for me.

And this episode is all about resistance.

So there's been a lot that's been going on in my life and I haven't really been feeling super outgoing lately.

So I haven't been sharing as much online.

I haven't been feeling as inspired lately,

I think.

I haven't really wanted to create,

You know,

Even recording podcast episodes has been a little bit challenging,

Even though it's something that just brings me a massive amount of joy.

I genuinely really,

Really love it.

But yeah,

I've been setting up my home office and that's kind of that's been really exciting and that's actually where I'm recording from now.

It's really starting to come together and I'm learning a lot about the power of curating a space because the more I curate the space,

The more I get it set up,

The more I feel at home and at peace with the environment I'm in and I feel also like once it's set up and maybe a little bit more organized,

I feel too like it'll be really inspiring to be in this kind of space,

Which is hilarious because it kind of goes against what I was just saying about not feeling super inspired.

But yeah,

Another thing that's come up lately for me is I've been launching a new one-on-one coaching program.

I created it actually last year,

But I didn't really make it in time to kind of share it.

And this year I finally decided to do that and man oh man has it brought up a lot of shit.

So I've been feeling a massive amount of resistance and just a lot of unworthiness since I launched this.

I've never launched anything before.

I feel like I'm probably quote unquote doing it wrong and it's kind of been like a huge learning curve.

I feel like the less I feel successful with this launch,

The more resistance I feel to kind of my business in general.

So that's kind of been a bit of a struggle lately.

I'm really concerned that my message isn't really reaching as many people as I would like it to and that's kind of made me question like my capabilities as a coach and you know as a creator and am I doing the right thing and should I keep going with trying to build this business?

I feel like a lot of what's been coming up for me lately has been really calling into question like who I am and how I show up in the world and what kind of person I want to be.

But it's been really hard.

It's been really really hard because I really thought that I was building a good foundation.

I really thought that I was gaining some traction and since I launched this program and even the last few episodes of the podcast when I've kind of shared them on social media and shared them just in general,

I've gotten such amazing feedback from family and friends and from my clients but haven't really gotten any like kind of feedback from like a wider audience and it's been hard feeling like I'm talking into the ether in some cases.

So that's not what it's about for me.

Like I do this because I genuinely want to I can't imagine doing anything else but it has been kind of making me question like holy shit like am I any good at doing this?

Like do people actually care what I have to say?

Am I worthy of this?

Which is such bullshit and I know that because I teach worthiness all the time and it's something that comes up inevitably with every single client but it's been really interesting because I've been experiencing it more lately than I normally do.

I feel like I usually have a very solid foundation and it actually I think bleeds into this next aspect of my life which is health-wise I've been feeling a little off and I think that that is influencing absolutely everything.

I realized recently that I've been consuming an inordinate amount of sugar lately and I'm trying to get that in check because I feel like it's actually influencing every other area of my life.

So in addition to the sugar intake I've been feeling a lot of fatigue and I've been feeling really anxious and stressed.

Now I'm a relatively anxious person and I feel anxious anxiety I think just as a base but lately I've been like feeling anxious and when I feel anxious I know that it's at a really really really high level like much higher than it should be because if I'm anxious as a baseline but then I'm saying that I feel anxious I know that it's much much worse and I think that my health is kind of influencing everything else because when you're tired you feel less inspired and when you're not feeling very comfortable in your body of course you're not going to feel called to create of course you know you're going to be feeling kind of like you're going to be in a space where you're questioning things a lot more and that's definitely where I've been.

I definitely feel like I have not wanted to be super outgoing both online in real life and it's all just you know kind of coming I think coming together with this piece about the sugar so I'm definitely looking into my health and trying to get that in check.

Now having said all of this and kind of talking about you know the anxiety the stress launching something and not really knowing how having a lower level of engagement online kind of hearing crickets so to speak when I post something and feeling uninspired you know normally in the podcast this would be the time where I come up and I say to you okay and here's how you know you fix it and like here's what you should do and I know that we love a romanticized story and a good how to to get over things like I'm definitely you know I'm super here for that but today I don't have either one of those to share just because today I'm here only with an open heart and the cold hard truth sometimes you just have to do it and it fucking sucks and it fucking sucks but that is the answer.

The reality is is that self-help in a lot of ways teaches us tools that we can use to make the doing it easier but if you don't sit down and actually do whatever it is that you need to do and you know trust me you know what you need to do but if you're not willing to just do it nothing ever changes I can guide you I can support you I can cheer you on I can give you all the tools on planet earth in order to make your life easier but if you don't decide that you're just going to do it whether it's scary whether it hurts whether you're tired whether you feel like it or not I can't do anything more than that as a coach and I'm seeing that with myself now because I'm I'm gonna I'm gonna be real I'm gonna share some realness more realness today is Thursday and the podcast is due tomorrow it's almost 4 p.

M.

And it launches 1 p.

M.

On Friday so like I have like cut this down to the wire essentially because I felt so uninspired and because I just didn't feel like I had anything to say and because I was feeling so unworthy and so not enough with how this program launch has gone and it's just funny because like there's nothing else to do I made a commitment that on Fridays I would launch a podcast and I don't have any desire to show up as a lesser version than the person who promised that they would do that and so here I am at 4 p.

M.

On Thursday recording this podcast because it fucking needs to be done and I've decided to share my journey with you because I feel like going through this resistance and this kind of harsh met this oh my god this harsh message of just fucking do it as Nike says is is relevant because we romanticize personal growth sometimes we romanticize self-care we romanticize romanticize self-love but the reality is is that at the end of the day you just have to wake up get off your fucking ass and fucking do it there is no substitute there's no other path to take there's no shiny course that will save you or teach you the missing key of what you need to do next because you already know what you need to do next the only step missing is the actual doing it and I know that sounds super harsh and I am going to be real here I'm okay with the tough love I'm okay with handing down these truth bombs because a lot of people especially in the personal development industry are willing to hold your hand and I'm fucking not I'm not willing to hold your hand because I'm not willing to hold my own hand if I'm not going to approach myself this way I certainly wouldn't approach someone else that way and I know that there are coaches out there and I know that there are clients who need that and those people will find each other but I also know that I'm not the right person to be leading you so if this message doesn't resonate with you I can totally respect you saying like hey I'm not into listening to this podcast anymore like cool because this is the way it is if you don't just decide at a certain point that even though you're fucking scared and even though it's hard and even though you're tired and even though and even though and even though you're gonna do it anyways that is how you move forward that is how you get past resistance I am here recording this podcast anyways regardless of whether it's something that like I really wanted to do and now that I'm in it I think you can even hear by the tone of my voice I'm fucking in this like I'm on fire I'm ready and I'm sharing my truth but when I started it I was like oh you know but is this really something worth sharing and do people really want to hear this but you can't create for other people you have to have to have to create work do play and be for yourself and so I'm honoring myself today by not listening to the fatigue or the sugar hangover or making excuses and giving myself permission to slack off trust me I have done all of those things over the last couple weeks because I had lots of time even to bank podcast episodes because I had a few recorded into the future but I gave myself permission already to do all of those things and it didn't work it didn't inspire me I don't feel any less tired I mean I did take time to honor myself as well and take care of myself in those two weeks because that's important too but there comes a line in the sand where you have to say okay fuck it I'm just gonna show up and that's exactly what I'm doing today I'm showing up I'm sharing my story and fucking doing what needs to be done that's it that's all and sometimes the this is the best that we've got okay and that's totally okay it's totally fucking okay one of the things I'm learning on my journey to releasing and healing perfectionism is that it's okay if sometimes I only show up at 100% and not 110 or 150 percent like I'm used to doing and I know that that sounds maybe even arrogant or a little bit like exaggerated but I swear to you and for anyone who knows me personally there's no such thing as only showing up 100% like if I'm in something I am in it I'm gonna do my absolute fucking best all the time and that's the end of it but I'm realizing that that is perfectionism like if I don't show up and if I don't over deliver and if I don't over give then I'm not worthy then I'm not good enough it's a sneaky sneaky way of making me one overachieve but it also leads to like burnout because I am constantly giving at such a high level that I am pushing myself too far and like depleting my resources faster than I would necessarily need to and I'm really realizing as I move forward that you know it's okay if sometimes I only show up at 90% if that's day if that day that's all I've got as long as I keep showing up that's what really matters it's the showing up that matters okay so today I'm here and I'm showing up and I'm hoping that it inspires you to keep going even and especially when you don't think you can because your success is right on the other fucking side of that it really really is whatever it is that you're working towards and this resistance applies to any kind of goal that you're working towards you want to start the business fucking do it you want to eat healthier make one healthier decision today show up for yourself you want to start exercising start exercising find a way to do one thing today one fucking thing it doesn't have to be something crazy or intense or whatever you just need to do that one thing and it's so powerful I promise you it is so powerful when you show up for yourself like that you build a level of self-confidence that you just cannot buy because when you say you're gonna do something and you commit to it and you fucking show up for yourself it makes the biggest difference because you made a promise to yourself that you kept and you are building trust and self-belief in yourself and inevitably self-confidence so I hope that this story inspires you because I know that it's like completely different I'm not really giving you any like tips or tricks except for just fucking do it you know just fucking show up and just do the best that you can in that moment with what you've got but I think it's a super important message to remember because we get so fucking down on ourselves for not being perfect or not having all the resources or not having all the tools or not having all this or that and we make excuses excuses for why we don't just do something and the reality is is because we were scared or we think we're not good enough and I have been there I am fucking there right now and I'd like to add in in addition to all the things that I've said to you that this afternoon I'm also working out even though I also don't want to because I know that I'm gonna feel better when I get to the other side of that hour and it is going to make such such such a huge difference in my own sense of self-confidence and then obviously in my health which is something I shared I'm working towards so yeah hope this inspires you and if you're interested in hearing more about the coaching program that I'm launching I would love it if you would head to my website and check it out it's called September is the New January which I think is fantastic and it's all about finishing 2019 strong and moving towards 2020 having already achieved the intentions and goals that you set for your New Year's resolutions in 2019 and setting you up so you can set even more amazing goals in 2020 and achieve them on your own.

Coaching is all about setting you up for long-term success even outside of the coaching series I would love it if you guys would give me any feedback you have or if you have any questions you know you can always reach out the link is www.

Candicealacia.

Com slash September and yeah I just would love it if you guys would give it a go and if you have any comments about the podcast please please please send them along I'd love to hear them and if you have anybody that you want to reach out that you want me to reach out to sorry or that you want me to connect with then please like drop me a line and tell me hey I think you should have a chat with this person I would love to start doing some interviews on the podcast to better serve you guys and yeah that's about it sending you guys so so much love and hoping that you just fucking show up and do it today go out there and kick ass because I know you can talk to you guys soon.

Reviews

It came to me in right time, as I was struggling to overcome resistance to action. Thank you

i totally get this. you recorded this pre-covid. now, in these days of covid, i think it’s harder to stay focused, be kind to ourselves, & reach for the stars, yadayada. it’s really a fulltime job!!! stay healthy! be well!

Exactly what I needed to hear 🙏