Banders are a set of invisible lines that mark a point where our emotional or personal capacity ends.
These marks often get crossed if we don't actually know where that line is,
And we let other people define it for us.
This usually ends up with us being frustrated,
Angry at others or even ourselves.
So how can we start setting boundaries?
The only way to truly start setting these lines and boundaries is by knowing ourselves,
Knowing what we need,
When we need it,
And most of all loving ourselves enough to prioritize ourselves in moments where it's the most important.
Most of us screw up being told that we are responsible for other people's emotions and feelings around us.
We get told things like,
Don't make mom or dad sad,
Do this or do that,
Otherwise I might get angry or I might feel disappointed.
So even when our body and soul went deep inside and intuition was telling us that we don't want to do something,
That doing so is crossing a boundary or it is simply something we want to say no to for no particular reason or because we don't have the emotional or physical capacity to fulfill those needs of others,
We still did it because disappointing others felt worse than betraying our own intuition and self.
So if you truly want to start setting boundaries,
Start by being kind to yourself,
Being attentive to your intuition and knowing what you need and truly listen to it,
And also telling yourself that you are not responsible for other people's feelings and perceptions of you.
Prioritize yourself and see how in the long term it changes your relationships because you won't feel resentment for doing something you don't actually want to do.
You won't feel overwhelmed and exhausted because you know where you need to stop and set a firm,
Loving boundary.
Setting boundaries saying no is not mean.
It is an act of love towards ourselves and even others.
In the long term it will improve your connection within and on the outside,
In your environment,
In your family,
Between your friends,
Because you will start doing things that you actually enjoy and set a boundary when you don't want to do something.
So how can you practice setting boundaries and loving yourself today?
You can simply do a morning meditation and ask yourself what you need that day.
Remind yourself where your boundaries have been crossed before and make sure that in the moment you come back to your body and listen to your intuition.
When your body says no,
When your mind says no,
Ask yourself why are you still saying yes?
And just listen to yourself and love yourself and give yourself compassion because that's how you can get closer to yourself and recognize and set those firm boundaries.
