Hello and welcome to the Peacekeeper Project.
My name is Ben.
Now today I want to share some reflections on judgement.
Now have you ever felt judged?
Because if you have,
This is an important video for you.
Now we've all experienced judgement at some point in our life,
Or many points most likely.
We feel judged by other people.
Sometimes we judge other people.
Sometimes we judge ourselves.
Now,
Everything I'm going to share here today is in the context of growth,
Inner growth.
Because if we want to cultivate a deeper sense of freedom and peace inside ourself,
And I know you do because that's why you're here,
Then there's something really important to understand about judgement.
And that is that feeling judged and being judged are not the same thing.
Just because we feel judged does not mean we are being judged.
And just because someone might be judging us does not mean we have to feel judged.
Right,
So let's dive into this.
So how we feel is up to us.
Now how we feel is often a reaction to other people,
To the things they say.
But how we feel and react is a result of our conditioning,
Our personality makeup or our sense of self.
And that's made up of our emotions,
Our fears,
Insecurities,
Traumas,
The attitudes we've developed and the beliefs that we hold,
Whether those beliefs are true or not.
So someone says something and we feel judged.
And so we blame them for how we feel.
We blame them for feeling judged.
But we feel judged because we reacted in a certain way to what they said.
Now we don't have to look at this as good,
Bad,
Right or wrong,
But if our intention is growth,
Then it is important to understand what is actually happening inside us.
So in that example,
What's happening?
Well,
Someone said something,
We reacted,
We felt judged.
So does this make sense?
Can you feel that?
Can you feel it inside yourself?
Can you acknowledge it?
Now let's look at the other side.
Let's look at being judged.
Now being judged is something someone outside of us does.
It's an external thing.
So sometimes being judged and feeling judged happens together,
Like there's an alignment.
Other times,
There's not.
So sometimes we feel judged when someone is judging us,
We react to what they said.
Other times,
Someone might be judging us and we don't react,
And it doesn't bother us at all.
And then sometimes we feel judged for other reasons.
So for example,
Maybe someone is asking you a question.
Now if someone is asking you a question about something you did,
Said,
Or maybe something that you believe,
Then you might take it personally and feel like they're judging you.
Now even if that person just genuinely wanted to understand why you believe what you believe,
Maybe they wanted to have a conversation,
You might still react defensively or with anger.
Because if we're insecure about who we are,
Or if our sense of self is deeply embedded in our beliefs,
Then anything that questions that can feel like an attack or a judgment.
But remember,
Feeling judged is our thing.
So in this context,
There's still a reaction to something external,
The thing that someone said.
So can you see this difference?
Can you see this important distinction between feeling judged and being judged?
Because remember,
Just because we feel judged,
Does not mean we are being judged.
And just because someone might be judging us,
Does not mean we have to feel judged.
Okay,
So what can you do with this?
Well for starters,
There will always be times when people might try to judge you.
But remember,
That's their thing,
So there's not a whole lot you can do about that.
So if you can,
Just let that go.
Because what you can focus on,
What you can do something about is when you feel judged.
Now a good place to start is just having this understanding of the difference between feeling judged and being judged.
And then apply it to life.
And then start to notice those times in your life when you feel judged.
Just notice it.
Because when you feel judged,
Sometimes there's that reactivity,
There's a sense of being more defensive.
Sometimes we can justify all of our emotions by blaming someone else.
We blame them for how we feel because we feel judged.
But that's not helping you to grow.
So just be present to how you feel,
The feelings,
When you feel judged.
Because when we feel it,
More emotions can come up.
Judgment,
When we feel judged,
It can bring up more.
So just be present to the degree that you're able to just feel your emotions.
The degree you're able to feel your emotions will grow over time as you practice more.
And remember,
When these reactions happen,
They usually start on an unconscious level.
So to change these habits,
We need to make them conscious.
So it just starts by awareness,
Being aware of it.
And then keeping in that context of understanding the difference between feeling judged and being judged.
And that's it.
That's the practice.
It helps you grow in that internal self-awareness.
And then the next step is really taking responsibility for your emotions.
Can you take responsibility for your emotions because you know your emotions are your emotions?
Now,
Owning our emotions and taking responsibility for them can be challenging at times.
But something that can be really helpful is curiosity.
Curiosity is such a powerful attitude for self-inquiry and growth.
Because you know that when you feel curious about something,
It brings a certain lightness.
As opposed to the heaviness that can sometimes come with emotions,
Making it harder to feel and work with.
And when we engage curiosity,
It makes us feel closer and more connected to the thing we're curious about.
And in this case,
It's our self and our emotions.
So if you're feeling judged,
Engage your curiosity.
Let your curiosity take you deeper into yourself.
And you can ask questions like,
Why do I feel judged?
What beliefs am I holding on to?
What emotions and feelings am I experiencing?
But most importantly,
Play with it.
You're on a journey of self-discovery.
So enjoy it.
You're an explorer,
Exploring the landscapes of your mind and your emotions on this journey to your heart.
Now let me know in the comments below,
Was this video helpful?
Did it make sense?
Did something stand out for you?
All right.
Thank you for being here.
I really appreciate your presence.
And until the next time,
Quiet your mind and live from your heart.
