Beginning with a few deep breaths,
Closing your eyes if you feel comfortable,
Or just gazing downward,
Letting your attention turn inward.
Now bring to mind a place where you're hard on yourself.
Perhaps there's something very fresh or present for you that you're struggling with,
Or maybe just calling up an area in your life where you're commonly critical,
Where in your mind you hear the word should often can sometimes be a good clue.
Not choosing anything too big right now,
Or too intense for this short practice,
But some place where you hold yourself to how you think you should be.
Perhaps you're critical of your appearance,
Your work or career accomplishments,
Or maybe in relationships.
Just noticing now,
Giving a microphone to the part that puts you down or criticizes you in some way,
Just let that part go for a bit.
Allow yourself to be curious.
If this feels a bit too threatening,
You might put this part of you in a room in your mind's eye and find yourself standing behind a window as you get to know it,
Paying attention to what you observe in your body,
Any sensations,
Emotions that arise as you listen to this part of you that can be unkind or critical,
Maybe even cruel,
Just observing it,
Getting curious.
You might hear the words from this critical part,
You might get an image,
However it shows up is fine.
And now let that part that's sharing its concern with you,
Its worry,
Fear or criticism,
Let it know that you see it.
You're there with it and it's not alone.
See if you get a sense of the role that it's playing in your life.
Is it trying to help you in some way?
What role is it playing?
What is its intention?
You might ask it now to help you understand.
Perhaps it wants you to stay small,
To avoid others' judgment,
To protect from being hurt,
In some way trying to keep you safe,
To avoid harm.
See if any of that fits.
Looking to see also how long it's been there,
Guarding you.
You might have memories arise,
Following back the thread of when this part of you,
How long it's been in your life.
And now if it feels okay,
Perhaps acknowledge the role that it plays.
You might have gotten a sense of how it's really been working on your behalf in some way,
Even if that's not always how it feels.
Let it know you see how hard it's been working,
Maybe even thanking it for trying to help you if you did get a sense that its intention is in some way trying to serve you,
Trying to help you in your life,
Even if it's painful.
Notice how it feels when you offer it your gratitude,
Your acknowledgement,
And ask it now if it would be willing to give you some space.
Just notice its reaction.
You might notice already a shift of softening,
Or perhaps there's a sense of cautiousness,
Perhaps a very strong no,
It's not willing to go anywhere right now,
Really believes that it's needed.
And you might experiment here with an expression of care to yourself through touch,
Placing a hand on your heart or your chest,
Feeling the warmth of your hand against your chest or your heart area,
And take a few deep breaths.
Notice the calm and the soothing as you breathe in and out like waves of the ocean,
Offering loving energy and intentions of care to yourself right now.
And notice how your body receives these gestures of care,
How your nervous system might relax even just a little bit.
What does that feel like to open to and send acknowledgement,
Maybe even gratitude to this part of you that seems like it's turned against you,
That it's not loving you?
What's it like to just listen to it and try and get to know and understand the role that it's trying to play in your life,
To acknowledge it and thank it?
In this last moment or two in the practice,
Perhaps offering a kind and loving energy to all that's come up in this short meditation,
Maybe thoughts or feelings of doubt or resistance,
A sense of cautiousness,
Maybe fear or anxiety.
Perhaps you noticed a sense of feeling less than,
Insecurity or feelings of unworthiness,
Sending some loving energy,
Some kindness and care to all of the parts that have come up today as best as you can in this moment,
Trusting your inner world as it is,
That it's doing the best that it can and that all of you is deserving of love and compassion.
