Loving Kindness Meditation - Relationships (30 Mins) 4.3.23
by Abbey Harmon
Thank you so much for joining me here today. We are taking 30 minutes to complete a traditional Loving Kindness or Metta meditation as I know it. We repeat phrases to ourselves, sending them to different groups of people. I use the phrases: May you be happy, may you be healthy, may you be safe, may you live with ease. I believe with these practices we can change the word together. With Love, Namaste - Abbey
Transcript
Hello and welcome.
Thank you so much for joining me here today.
My name is Abby,
And I'm a yogi,
Salesforce engineer and creator of Consider Volunteering,
My personal brand of community empowerment.
And I'm back with Meditation Monday,
Where over the next 30 minutes,
Together we will complete a loving kindness meditation from start to finish.
No prior experience necessary.
I will walk you through all of the steps over the next 30 minutes.
And so the first step in our meditation today is going to be finding our way to a comfortable seat.
So I sit here on my meditation cushion in my yoga office room,
But do feel free to select whatever position feels good to you today,
Lying down on the couch,
You know,
Whatever works for you on this particular April Monday.
And so our meditation practice,
Our loving kindness practice,
I've chosen to share with the world because I believe it makes the world a better place with each and every practice,
No matter how good we do at a particular practice.
This is not about good or bad.
This practice does make positive benefits,
No matter how well we think we are doing the practice.
So that's why I choose this one because it combats those negative thoughts that I know plague my mind way too regularly,
And maybe just maybe plague yours as well.
And so over the next 30 minutes,
We're going to reprogram our brains,
Stretch those neurons up there in order to find more compassion in this world.
And so our meditation,
Our loving kindness meditation for today consists of two main parts.
First will be our set of phrases that we will repeat silently to ourselves.
So we repeat a set of phrases.
This sets our intention and our focus towards these more positive thoughts.
And so the set of phrases I will be using today are,
May you be happy,
May you be healthy,
May you be safe,
May you live with ease.
These are just example phrases,
No need to use them yourself.
I promise the rhythm does come in time.
And so that's the first part of our practice,
These phrases that we will repeat silently to ourselves.
You could definitely say them out loud as I will repeat them here many a time.
But I do like to take this practice off the mat.
So I often say them silently to myself,
Right,
Those mental words.
Because,
Right,
We can always pull this out when we need it,
Say,
In the airport security line,
Maybe the grocery store,
All those good times where we find ourselves waiting and maybe don't want to scroll on our phone.
So these loving kindness phrases can help us off the mat as we send them to five different groups of people.
So we start with the self,
Filling up our cup before moving on our journey through our loving kindness phrases today.
But first,
We will send our phrases to the self.
Then we move into a loving relationship.
So second,
We will pick a loving relationship that we'd like to dedicate maybe our practice to today,
A teacher,
Mentor,
Friend,
Family member,
Somebody where we'd really like to relish the joy and this loving relationship.
Third,
We send our loving kindness phrases to a neutral relationship.
So I often describe this as a member of the public,
Somebody within our community that we really don't know well,
But maybe we interact with regularly.
I'm thinking those at the grocery store,
I definitely know I see the same faces maybe on the train on your way to work,
Something of that nature,
Or neutral relationship as we write find compassion in all areas of our life.
As fourth,
We send our phrases to a difficult relationship,
Often described as my least favorite part of the practice,
But we may find we must find balance.
And so forth,
We will send our loving kindness phrases to a difficult relationship in hopes to find a new perspective and maybe shift the narrative,
Even if it's just the smallest of bits.
Because last but not least,
At least for me,
It feels like a sigh of release.
And we send our phrases to all beings everywhere,
Cherishing our connection to everyone that powers this beautiful energy on this rock in the universe.
So fifth,
We will send our phrases to all beings everywhere.
But that's that.
We've got our phrases and our groups.
And so I hope you found your way to your comfortable seat.
This is now time to start into our first set of phrases towards the self.
The hardest part was getting here.
So now we get to take this short five minutes to really appreciate be grateful to ourselves for taking this time on this Monday to prepare for the week ahead.
And so bringing ourselves to mind and our hearts,
Feeling how you are supported by yourself,
Right?
I've got this deepest faith in myself.
May I be happy.
May I be healthy.
May I be safe.
May I live with ease.
May I be happy.
May I be healthy.
May I be safe.
May I live with ease.
May I be happy.
May I be healthy.
May I be safe.
May I live with ease and continue on your own.
I snorted boy.
My Zeeky friend too must be feeling the full moon energy that is coming up here this Wednesday.
I know I am finding it hard to settle into my practice.
I would expect I might have some trouble sleeping.
And so what new perspective can I take knowing that things may be a bit more crazy,
More messy.
I'm so relishing in this short five minutes that I get to take for myself grounding,
Even if it takes me all five minutes to finally settle into my phrases.
It's perfectly fine.
The practice is making a difference.
You have your own back always.
May I be happy.
May I be healthy.
May I be safe.
May I live with ease.
May I be happy.
May I be healthy.
May I be safe.
May I live with ease.
Without my dear friends,
It is time to set down the self.
Taking one last notice of how your thoughts of the self has shifted in the last five minutes.
As we transition into our loving relationship for this week.
What loving relationship might you want to cherish today?
A mentor,
A friend.
I've been doing a lot in community recently,
So I'm thinking about these more related relationships,
New relationships,
And how beautiful it is to make friends.
Right?
How rare that is nowadays.
And so I relish these friends that I have,
No matter my connection to them.
May you be happy.
May you be healthy.
May you be safe.
May you live with ease.
May you be happy.
May you be healthy.
May you be safe.
May you live with ease.
May you be happy.
May you be healthy.
May you be safe.
May you live with ease.
As someone who believes they are neurodivergent,
I fall into the trope of taking forever to text people back.
I have decision fatigue.
So deciding what to write and writing down my thoughts is like the worst thing in the world.
So texting and emails,
Man,
I'm so old school wanting to chat with people over the phone or video call nowadays.
And I just want to say that it's not too late to reply.
Reply when you reply,
When you care.
The person on the other end is really that meaningful to you.
It won't matter how long it's been.
They will appreciate that you've reached out.
So don't add that second arrow of shame to the self.
Just love where love is.
May you be happy.
May you be healthy.
May you be safe.
May you live with ease.
May you be happy.
May you be healthy.
May you be safe.
May you live with ease.
And with that,
Dear friends,
It is time to take one last notice of our loving relationship for this week.
How has that thinking about this relationship made you feel?
I'd like to feel light and unencumbered when I think about these loving relationships.
Right?
I really want to be seen and I hope you feel seen as well.
And with that,
We transition into our neutral relationship for this week.
Remember of the community,
Somebody we don't know so well,
But maybe see on a regular basis.
No matter if they test you as are my little doggie here is going to test us with outside distractions and noises.
We let those things go at least as much as we can.
And we continue with our phrases towards our neutral relationship this week.
Remember of the community.
May you be happy.
May you be healthy.
May you be safe.
May you live with ease.
May you be happy.
May you be healthy.
May you be safe.
May you live with ease.
May you be happy.
May you be healthy.
May you be safe.
May you live with ease.
Life will test us in so many ways.
And I believe the more present that I can be as life tests me,
As my community may test me,
I think the more compassionate,
More mutually beneficial outcomes and decisions can be made when we are present with each other,
Open hearts,
Not so much judgment towards ourselves and others.
So how can't we take this new perspective through our loving kindness meditation,
Our phrases,
Giving us more opportunity to see the light and all.
May you be happy.
May you be healthy.
May you be safe.
May you live with ease.
May you be happy.
May you be healthy.
May you be safe.
May you live with ease.
And with that,
My dear friends,
It is time to take one last notice of our neutral relationship this week.
How has it made us feel?
My neighbors started to playing their ska,
Which is fun.
They're playing some fun jazz over the weekend.
They're quite talented.
I hear it lovingly from my backyard.
With that,
We transition into our difficult relationship for this week.
No matter how big this difficult relationship is for you,
We will take a short five minutes to send our loving kindness phrases to it in hopes of finding a new perspective,
Breaking down those barriers,
Those preconceived notions that we maybe have been carrying around for a while.
Today is the day to shift them as we are being tested.
Maybe also test yourself and find something new is on the surface.
May you be happy.
May you be healthy.
May you be safe.
May you live with ease.
May you be happy.
May you be healthy.
May you be safe.
May you live with ease.
May you be happy.
May you be healthy.
May you be safe.
May you live with ease.
I found it interesting of late how much I've noticed my physical reaction to these difficult relationships.
Something kind of come to a head and yet I find myself,
You know,
Getting on these calls and like sweating profusely and my heart is just racing and I'm like practically hyperventilating.
And so in those times,
I've been trying to call back in my loving kindness meditation to sit with the feeling,
Hopefully let it run its course,
And hopefully maybe just maybe allow my breath to become more steady,
My groundedness to win out,
And hopefully be more present in these relationships when I know kind of preconceived that things are a little stressful for me.
So maybe next time you notice,
Oh,
I'm feeling nervous walking in here,
These loving kindness phrases can support you whenever you need them.
May you be happy.
May you be healthy.
May you be safe.
May you live with ease.
May you be happy.
May you be healthy.
May you be safe.
May you live with ease.
And with that,
Dear friends,
It is time to set down our difficult relationship for this week.
Maybe just maybe you're still feeling lost.
I find a one-on-one conversation is the best approach in these difficult relationships.
Difficult conversation,
But being over,
Being present,
Just think about it for next time.
As we transition to our fifth and final group for today,
All beings everywhere.
May all beings on this planet find peace.
Yes,
My answer is truly world peace.
If I had my one wish,
It would be world peace.
I'll go write a sci-fi novel about that for sure.
May all beings,
May you be happy.
May you be healthy.
May you be safe.
May you live with ease.
May you be happy.
May you be healthy.
May you be safe.
May you live with ease.
May you be happy.
May you be healthy.
May you be safe.
May you live with ease.
When you're feeling tested and you're not sure which way is out,
My question for you is,
Is this the scenario you need to be in?
Right?
We do have the ability,
As Elise Meyer says,
To not receive something,
Right?
If I'm too much,
Go find less.
And so if you find yourself tested,
As maybe we have been today,
Is this scenario we need to be in?
Maybe this wasn't the exact moment we were supposed to do something,
Or maybe this allows us to have that pause where we can choose a different path.
Maybe that would have saved me some heartache in the past if I would have just had that second to notice this discomfort in order to choose something different for myself instead of feeling the need to continue on for continuity's sake.
May you be happy.
May you be healthy.
May you be healthy.
May you be safe.
May you live with ease.
May you be happy.
May you be healthy.
May you be safe.
May you live with ease.
With that,
My dear friends,
Our practice is at an end for today.
Maybe just maybe you take one last moment to notice how you feel,
How this new person is after this 30-minute loving-kindness meditation,
Because I promise you you are now more compassionate,
More loving towards ourselves and all of those around us,
Even if it's only that smallest,
Slightest percentage.
I appreciate you taking the time to connect with me here today.
Please be gentle with yourself as you get up.
I hope to see you next time as you truly make me a better person.
Until then,
With love,
Namaste.
May you be happy.
May you be healthy.
May you be safe.
May you live with ease.
