A Course in Miracles Lesson 182 I will be still an instant,
And go home.
This world you seem to live in is not home to you.
Somewhere in your mind you know that this is true.
A memory of home keeps haunting you as if there were a place that called you to return.
Although you do not recognize the voice,
And you do not recognize what the voice reminds you of,
Still you feel an alien here,
From somewhere all unknown.
Nothing so definite that you could say with certainty,
You are in exile here.
Just a persistent feeling,
Sometimes not more than a tiny throb,
At other times hardly remembered,
Actively dismissed.
Surely this feeling will return to your mind again.
No one knows what we speak of.
Some of us try to alleviate our suffering in games we play,
To occupy our time and keep our sadness away.
Others will deny that they are sad.
They do not recognize their tears at all.
Still others will maintain that what we speak of is illusion,
Not to be considered more than just a dream,
Who,
In simple honesty,
Without defensiveness and self-deception,
Would deny that they understand the words we speak.
We speak today for all of us who walk this world,
For we are not at home.
We go uncertainly about in endless search,
Seeking in darkness what we cannot find.
We do not recognize what it is we seek.
A thousand homes we make,
Yet none of these satisfies our restless mind.
We do not understand.
We build in vain.
The home we seek cannot be made by us.
There is no substitute for heaven.
All we ever made was hell.
Perhaps you think it is your childhood home that you would find again.
The childhood of our body and its place of shelter are a memory,
Now so distorted that we merely hold a picture of a past that never happened.
There is a holy child in us,
Our higher self,
Who seeks our Father's house,
A holy child that knows that we are alien here.
This child is eternal,
With an innocence that will endure forever.
Where this child shall go is holy ground.
It is the holiness of our higher self that lights up heaven.
It is the holiness of our higher self that brings to earth the pure reflection of the light above,
Wherein our earth and heaven join as one.
It is our higher self,
This holy child in us,
Our Father knows as His own child.
It is this holy child in us who knows our Father in heaven.
We desire to go home so deeply,
So unceasingly,
That the voice of the holy child cries unto us to let it rest a while.
Our higher self does not ask for more than just a few instants of relief,
Just an interval in which it can return home to breathe again the holy air that fills our Father's house.
We are home to our higher self as well.
It will return to us.
So give your higher self just a little time to be within the peace that is its home,
Resting in silence,
Resting in peace,
Resting in love.
Say to yourself,
Say in your mind,
I am one with my higher self.
I am one with the holy child.
We rest together,
Taking a break from this world for a few moments.
We breathe together the holy air of our Father's house,
Our home,
Resting in silence,
Resting in peace,
Resting in love.
Ponder on this,
Resting in silence,
Resting in peace,
Resting.
Our holy child needs our protection.
It is far from home.
It is so little,
So easily shut out.
Its tiny voice is so readily obscured that the call for help is almost unheard amid degrading sounds and harsh and rasping noises of the world.
But does our higher self know that in us still abides pure protection?
We will not fail.
Our higher self will go home,
And we will go home with it.
Our higher self is our defenselessness,
Our strength.
Our higher self trusts us.
The holy child came to this world knowing we would not fail.
The holy child whispers of its home to us unceasingly,
For it would bring us back home with it,
That it might stay home and not return again to this world,
This world where it does not belong and would not have to return again to this world where we live as an outcast,
Where we live in a world of alien thoughts.
The patience of our higher self has no limits.
It will wait until we hear its gentle voice within us,
Calling us to let the holy child of God go home in peace and bring us along.
When you are still and instant,
When the world recedes from you,
When valueless ideas cease to have value in your restless mind,
Then will you hear the voice of your higher self as it calls to you that you will not resist much longer.
In that instant,
Your higher self will take you home,
And you will stay in perfect stillness,
Silent and at peace,
Beyond all words,
Untouched by fear,
Untouched by doubt,
Sublimely certain you are at home.
Rest with your higher self,
The holy child,
Frequently,
Today.
Your higher self was willing to become a little child,
That you might learn of it,
How strong it really is.
Our higher self comes without defenses,
Offering only love's messages to those who think their higher self is their enemy.
Our higher self holds the might of heaven in hand and calls those who see an enemy,
My friend,
And gives strength to them that they may see that they do have a friend.
The higher self asks that they protect it,
For home is far away,
And our higher self will not return home alone.
Christ is reborn as a little child each time a wanderer leaves their home,
For the wanderers must learn that what they would protect is but this holy child who comes defenseless,
Who is protected by defenselessness.
Go home with your higher self from time to time,
Today.
You are as much an alien here as is your higher self.
Take time today to lay aside your shield,
Which profits nothing.
Lay down the spear and the sword you raise against an enemy that does not exist.
Christ has called you friend and brother and sister.
He has even come to ask your help in letting him go home today,
Completed and completely.
Christ has come as does a little child who must beseech their father for protection and for love.
Christ rules the universe,
And yet he asks unceasingly that you return home with him and take illusions as your gods no more.
You have not lost your innocence.
It is for this you yearn.
Innocence is your heart's desire.
Innocence is the voice you hear.
Innocence is the call which cannot be denied.
The holy child remains with you.
The holy child's home is yours.
The holy child gives you its defenselessness.
Today you accept defenselessness in exchange for all the toys of battle you have made.
The way is open.
The journey has an end in sight.
At last.
Now be still for an instant.
Go home with your higher self and be at peace with the holy child for a little while.
I am one with my higher self.
I am one with the holy child.
We rest together.
We breathe together the holy air of our father's house,
Our home,
Resting in silence,
Resting in peace,
Resting in love.
I will be still for an instant and go home.
Nothing real can be threatened.
Nothing unreal exists.
Herein lies the peace of God.
