What Is Dispassion?

Conversations on the path to an open heart. Join us for this unique opportunity to engage deeply in the journey of conscious evolution. In this meeting, we will discuss the deepest meaning of dispassion. Join us to share your questions, insights, and doubts as we grow together on the path to an open heart.

Let’s explore and dissolve the barriers standing between you and awakened consciousness. Bring a friend, and together, let’s spark a movement toward collective sanity.

Co-hosted by our beloved Carly Beaulieu

Transcript

Hello dear people,

Welcome.

This unique opportunity we give ourselves every week.

Stop the rush,

Hold hands and walk the path together.

Coming closer and closer to an expression of an awakened consciousness.

In today's meeting we use the excuse to meet following the question of what is this passion and why is it such a virtue on the spiritual path.

So,

I invite you to contribute to this session by be active,

Ask your questions,

Share your insights.

You know,

It's not a lecture.

I don't have a set of ideas and concepts that I'm about to convey to you.

I can only respond to the pace and the depth that you set.

So,

To you.

Where do we go?

And Carly here will,

Our beloved Carly,

Will sound the voice of the sincere seeker.

Hello everybody.

What is this passion?

Who would like to be the first one to refer to this?

Maybe you can define the word for us in the spiritual context.

Yeah,

It's a tricky term.

And I think maybe the English translation of this passion might be a bit confusing.

A better term would probably be this desire.

But it sounds too funny in English,

This desire.

So,

This passion it is.

But what does it mean,

This passion?

This passion is a state of consciousness that is not attached.

To any experience.

In a sentence,

That is this passion.

It's not attached to any specific situation or experience.

And it's quite rare.

Because usually we are attached.

Whether we are aware of it or not,

We are attached.

We are attached to people,

We are attached to property,

We are attached to a circumstance that provides us some benefit.

At least,

That's the way we translate it.

We are attached to a position,

We are attached to a set of ideas.

Disattachment.

Maybe that's a better word than dispassion.

Because you know what?

I'm going to tell everything else.

Waiting for your questions.

So,

This is dispassion.

A state of consciousness that is not attached.

Rows beyond attachment.

Tell us everything,

We're dying to hear it all.

But I can't.

I'm not allowed to.

Before you ask.

I'm asking,

Tell us.

Yeah,

I'll tell you everything,

But what do you want to know?

I want to know what you were about to say.

Christine is asking,

Free of emotion.

No,

No,

How can you be free of emotions?

It's impossible.

As long as you have a body.

Body comes with emotions.

The physical experience of you includes emotions.

Just as it's including sensations and thoughts.

You cannot grow beyond emotions.

It's like saying,

One day I will have no thoughts.

If you wait for that day,

I guarantee.

There is a huge disappointment heading your way.

Beyond it.

Emotions,

Sensations and thoughts.

Is what build our reality.

So,

Don't wait for an existence without emotions.

And it's not a problem,

That's the way it's designed to be.

The trick is to be passionate.

Without attaching yourself to the experience or to the result of that experience.

That's the trick.

Usually,

When we hear dispassion,

We think about somebody who is,

You know,

Aloof.

You know,

He lost his passion about this world.

So,

He's not involved,

He's not engaged.

He doesn't care about earthly matters.

Possessions,

You know,

Relationships.

He doesn't care.

So,

You think,

No,

This is something I can't afford.

It sounds like something that would feel very dysregulating.

What does it mean?

When you think of something with no attachment or a word like dispassion,

It feels almost less human.

Yeah,

That's why the term dispassion is a bit misleading.

Because when we refer to dispassion on the spiritual path,

It doesn't mean that you live your life without passion.

No,

No.

Of course,

You are passionate about life.

About,

You know,

The opportunity you receive to experience the present moment.

You're so passionate,

More than ever before.

Because the fire of life is burning through you.

How can you not be passionate about it?

If you picture in your mind,

You know,

This image of a saint on the hill somewhere,

Where he's untouchable and he doesn't really involve himself with earthly,

Daily,

Whatever.

Then that's not what we're talking about when we say dispassion.

Yeah,

The fire of life is burning through you.

But,

You know,

Fire can be providing heat and warmth and light.

But it also can be devastating.

So when you are dispassion,

When you are an expression of dispassion,

Then that light is regulated.

That warmth is regulated.

The fire in you is regulated.

It doesn't burn you and not people around you and not the situations that you are involved in.

Okay,

Maybe it will be easier to explain the difference between passion and desire.

This is why I think this desire is better than dispassion.

If you really want to go deep into the meaning of dispassion,

You probably need to call it this desire.

What is desire?

I'm asking you,

What is desire?

Anyone has ever felt desire and can explain it?

A deep want?

Yeah,

You know,

Desire is that craving for an image that promises happiness for us or a sense of fulfillment.

And it always comes with feverishness.

Isn't it?

When I desire something,

I have an image in my head about what would make me happy.

Of course,

It doesn't exist here and now.

It has to be somewhere else,

Some other time.

This is not good enough.

And I believe that if I can get there and own that,

I can be happy,

I can be fulfilled.

So there is an image in my head about what would make me happy and fulfilled.

And that feverishness,

That until I get that,

I won't be satisfied or happy or content,

Fulfilled.

Right?

And desire is the emotional outcome of that feverishness.

See?

And people would go a long way to fulfill their desires,

Usually at the expense of other people.

Isn't it?

That's what I'm saying when I'm talking about a fire that is uncontrolled,

Destructive.

That doesn't come from the source of life that is burning through you.

But it's the ego believing that something else should happen before I can be fulfilled and happy.

Do you see what I'm saying?

This is desire.

We can desire,

You know,

A beautiful car.

We can desire.

.

.

Dessert.

Dessert.

We can desire,

You know,

A beautiful partner.

Or a potential future.

Yeah.

So what's common to all desires is that it's not available here and now.

Something else should happen.

And we live in that gap between what is and what I believe it should have been.

And there's always like a shadow,

A sense of feverishness.

Unsettled feverishness.

Believing that only when I get there,

Only when I achieve that,

When I own that.

.

.

You know,

Each one of us has the image of what would make me happy.

And this is,

You know,

From experience,

It never ends,

Right?

You chase something,

Usually you don't get it.

And when you do get it,

It's losing its taste after a few tries.

Right?

First time it's exciting and you feel,

Wow,

I achieved that and you're high.

Second time,

Oh,

It's really nice.

And third time,

Okay.

Fourth time,

Next.

Been there,

Done that.

And that.

.

.

You are never resolved in that sense because there is always a different further promise of happiness.

And that will never be resolved.

So I'm asking you now,

Look in the mirror and ask yourself,

What promise of happiness are you chasing?

And I urge you to share.

Anita is asking,

So is a state of equanimity,

However brief,

The impossible elusive dream then?

Do you understand the question?

Yeah,

A state of equanimity.

So balance or.

.

.

Equanimity is always good,

But how is that referring to what we are discussing?

So are we trying to achieve equanimity?

However brief,

Is that the impossible elusive dream?

Equanimity expresses itself as we mature on the path.

Yes,

But it's not directly related to what we are talking now.

So I'm not sure if you are referring to something I said,

Or is it a general question?

Balancing masculine and feminine is the ultimate expression of an awakened consciousness.

100%.

So Baba is saying?

Baba is defining your.

.

.

Yeah.

What was the word?

Desire.

Yeah.

A sense that I lack something and want it to be filled.

Yeah.

And Baba says,

I catch myself chasing safety.

Examples,

Still saving money,

Although I am retired and doing fine.

Desire to live closer to family for safety.

And Christine says,

Self-realization would be my desire.

See,

Even on the spiritual path,

Even if our intentions are the most pure and honorable,

It's still a gap.

I desire self-realization.

And it's okay,

You know,

We spoke about it many times in many different ways.

That's the last desire allowed on the path.

I want this,

I want that.

All of the I wants will drop.

And that is the last desire that you are allowed to keep.

I want to be awakened.

That's it.

Of course,

That want will drop and after that,

The I that wants also drops.

But the I want to be free will take you the furthest you can go on the path.

So keep that I want to be free and make it the most important thing for you.

The last desire.

The last temptation,

No?

Like the movie about Jesus.

Remember?

The last temptation of Christ.

What promise of happiness are you chasing?

Are you desiring?

Barbara said that I'm not disattached.

I almost always live in the gap.

And the more I look in the mirror,

The more I catch myself.

Yeah,

That's how we do it.

Looking at the mirror,

Recognizing our attachments and choosing to drop them one by one.

Just as you described.

Yeah.

Not disattached.

But at least I'm recognizing my attachments.

And I confront with that question,

With that invitation.

Do I want to drop these attachments?

Without being aware of them,

The conversation about can you drop your attachment is irrelevant.

That's why I'm asking,

What promise of happiness are you chasing?

Desire,

Eternal search for a fulfillment of a reality that carries the promise of happiness.

And you know,

As we grow old,

We might experience that we don't desire as we used to when we were young.

We're not driven by that force anymore.

At least not as much as we used to recognize ourselves being carried away by a desire.

There is something beautiful about desire,

Because it's such a powerful force.

And what can happen is that you lose yourself in that.

And losing oneself is one expression of an awakened consciousness.

So it can lead you to some kind of a taste of what a free consciousness feels like,

How it is experienced.

But usually we're just lost in the chase.

And we're not aware enough to recognize the no-self aspect of us chasing the promise of happiness.

You see what I'm saying?

We're not aware enough.

But as we grow old,

We might feel that we don't desire as much,

You know.

We somehow grow dimmer.

I'm using my words carefully here.

So I just want you to know that it's not a problem.

It's not a problem if you don't feel as burning with desire as you used to when you were younger.

It's a natural process where your body,

Mind,

Spirit complex is mature enough to realize that the promise of happiness is not hiding in the experience.

I mean,

It doesn't matter if you can word that in this way to yourself,

Or you're just having some dim realization about it in the back of your mind.

But life experience teaches you that chasing a promise of happiness again and again and again and again,

You know,

Raising the bar all the time,

Trying to reach a higher peak,

And never reaching happiness through unconditional happiness.

This teaches us that happiness is not a consequence of events.

Happiness is not a consequence of events.

And as we grow old,

That realization dawns on us.

So we are not so passionate as we once was,

Or at least full of desire.

It's a better way to express it.

What's going on?

Barbara says maybe you're wiser too as you get older.

Yeah,

Wise in that sense that,

You know,

You realize that the chase after happiness outside of you is useless and doesn't carry any fruit,

Long-term fruits.

Ward is saying,

I desire less and less of the material world and more and more of the spiritual.

Emptiness has become my bliss.

Jai Gurudev.

And Barbara says,

Wise in that you notice every once in a while the gap.

The more you are aware of those gaps,

The more it is easier for you to close them,

To deal with them and close them,

Right?

So as we grow,

As we mature,

We become wiser and desire doesn't propel us anymore,

At least not as much as it used to be.

Don't put yourself in a place where you're now having a new desire to live life without passion,

Because this passion is good on the spiritual path.

No,

That's not the message at all.

What we can do is look in the mirror and recognize,

Identify what are you attached to?

What warmness of happiness are you attached to?

What circumstances are you attached to?

What results of your actions are you attached to?

What people and situations are you attached to?

What position in life are you attached to?

And once you identify these for yourself,

One by one,

Ask yourself this question.

Am I willing to let go of this attachment?

Even life itself?

Even life itself.

Thankfully,

That's not up to you.

You dropping attachment to life itself doesn't mean that you stop living.

But you live without the attachment to it.

But nobody is asking me the relevant question here now.

Come on.

What's the relevant question?

Why is it important to drop these attachments?

Why is it important to drop these attachments?

Good question.

You can look at this question in many levels.

In a simplistic way,

You can say you cannot be free and attached.

Because attachment is a bondage,

Right?

And if you're attached to something,

You are bonded to it.

And you cannot be free and bonded.

It doesn't go together.

You have to decide.

Do you want to be bonded or do you want to be free?

This is a simplistic way to look at it.

If you're attached to a situation,

Then you can only be free when the situation presents itself.

And when it's not presenting itself,

Then you're lost.

You're helpless.

You're hopeless.

And you can only be happy when it materializes again for you.

If you're attached to a position in life,

For example,

I am a successful individual.

So it means you can only be comfortable in your skin when the definition of success is materializing according to your criteria.

But if you fail,

Then you're lost.

You're stepping away from your comfort zone.

If you're attached to a relationship,

Then you can only be happy and fulfilled when that relationship is there for you.

But if you lose that relationship,

Which is inevitable,

Then who you are,

What you are,

What are you without that relationship?

You see?

Anything you're attached to prevents freedom.

And again,

Listen to what I'm saying without generating a new idea.

You know,

People take that and create a new idea in their heads about what does it mean to be free.

If I need to be disattached from relationships,

Then I don't have any relationship.

If I need to be disattached from a position in life,

Then I don't have any position in life.

If I need to be disattached from material,

I have no material.

No,

That's not a situation.

That's not an invitation.

You don't avoid life.

You're truly engaged with life.

And if life is suggesting a relationship,

Then you thrive in it.

If life suggests a position,

Then go,

Go for it.

But you are flexible enough to reposition yourself when that position is irrelevant anymore.

You're not attached to a set of ideas and ideology.

Because life is much more complex than any ideology.

Ideology can express or contain.

So,

If there is an ideology that flows through you,

Fantastic.

Tomorrow,

The opposite ideology can be there,

As relevant as the one that you held yesterday.

And you're not attached to any position.

Do you see what I'm saying?

That's the difference.

You're completely engaged,

Involved,

Surrendered to what life has to offer without being attached to the experience.

What do you think?

Ward is asking,

What about being attached to the roof over your head?

That's the one I struggle with.

Could I let go of that attachment?

You tell me,

Can you?

Who will you be without the roof?

You will be exposed to the sun.

Who will you be?

Can you identify yourself without a house,

Without a home,

Without a shelter?

Can you be comfortable in your skin in any situation?

Facing any situation.

Can you be an expression of internal comfort that's got nothing to do with the situation?

There's this beautiful story that I keep telling about my teacher who visited Jerusalem about 20 years ago.

When it was really turmoil and there was a lot of terror and buses were exploding in the street,

It was really bad.

And he was interviewed by one journalist who asked him,

Are you comfortable coming to Jerusalem at this time,

In this situation?

And he said,

He didn't really understand the question.

He said,

I'm not looking for comfort in my destination.

I bring the comfort with me.

It's so beautiful.

Isn't it?

You don't look for comfort where you come,

Where you go,

You know,

In the situation that you meet.

You are comfortable.

You are comfortable in your skin,

In any situation,

With every individual,

No matter what happens.

This is dispassion.

This is dispassion.

You are an expression of internal peace,

Internal comfort that pre-exists before meeting any situation.

It's not a consequence of a situation.

You see what I'm saying?

Barbara says,

My choice of shelter does not answer the question of who am I,

So I can rent,

Own,

Live at a retreat center,

Cruise ship,

Many ways to stay dry.

And if it rains,

It rains.

And you get wet.

It's not a problem.

Isn't it?

That's dispassion.

You're living in Seattle.

Without the rain.

What else?

Ward says,

My heart is pure no matter the circumstances.

Yeah.

And Irene was answering your question earlier.

Why are we pursuing dispassion?

That was the question,

Right?

To lose our struggle.

No,

Not dispassion,

But attachment.

How to lose attachment.

Why is it important to lose attachment?

Irene is saying to lose our struggle.

There's always a struggle.

When you're unable to be wide enough to embrace the present moment as it is,

It's a struggle.

Yeah,

I think every time I think about the silence within,

Or when you say during the meditation to turn towards itself,

It usually ends up some visualization of something in nature that is unshakable.

Like the sun shining down,

Or the river flowing,

Or the ocean waves,

Or this time it was a mountain.

So you think of a mountain struggling.

Even when a mountain crumbles and life ends,

It just surrenders to the gravity.

Gravity always wins.

Always.

Doesn't matter how long you're able to resist it.

Gravity always wins.

Christine says,

My sister is a living example of this grace and gratitude while living beyond the expected time with advanced brain cancer.

Wow.

It's inspiring.

Something so special that advanced disease can bring.

And you know what?

Sometimes we need that slap in the face as a wake up call from life.

You know many stories of people who suddenly appreciate life and how sacred it is only after life hits them hard.

After you lose someone you love or you have a sickness or something like that.

You know?

You have to go through this extreme experience to wake up and realize how precious this opportunity is.

But not necessarily.

You don't have to wait for that slap on the face.

You can wake up now.

You can wake up now.

Gently.

With a kiss on your forehead.

You don't need a slap on your face.

And if there is somebody you can use as a role model,

Like your sister.

Yeah.

Use that.

Be inspired.

She had to go through cancer.

You don't.

You're lucky enough to receive that invitation before the slap.

Wake up.

Time for one more question.

Word says,

I required the slap of my beloved's death.

Awakening has been the only salve to my loss.

You know we all experience pain and loss and sickness.

If that is happening,

It's good if we can use this as a wake-up call to remind us how precious life is and how precious this opportunity we receive to experience it.

We have a body through which we can experience pain and pleasure.

So instead of being angry at life and blame life for your misery,

Use those experiences to grow and to wake up to that realization.

But you don't need to wait for those experiences.

That's what I'm saying.

You can wake up with a gentle kiss.

You don't need a slap on your face necessarily.

Or a five kilo hammer on your head.

Do you?

What else needs to happen for you to wake up?

If you have an answer other than nothing to this question,

I urge you,

Look at that idea that you have.

What else should happen for you to wake up?

The only genuine answer you can have at this point is nothing.

Nothing.

Wake up.

Wake up to what?

To realize you're already that.

You are that.

Whatever you have in your head as a promise of happiness and fulfillment.

You are that.

Already.

Wake up.

There is no rainbow at the end of the journey.

That's how you say it?

No.

There is no happiness at the end of the rainbow.

Or something like that.

May humanity arrive with a gentle kiss.

And may you be the first to lead humanity.

Would you take that responsibility?

You.

You be the first.

Don't worry about humanity.

With pleasure.

This is the homework I would like to invite you to follow this week.

What is it that you're still attached to?

What promise of happiness are you chasing?

Desiring?

Desiring.

What reality?

What circumstance?

You are using as an excuse to be bonded.

To feel that you are still incomplete.

Open the mirror.

Ask yourself.

Thank you everybody for coming tonight or this morning,

Wherever you are.

Thank you for joining us and thank you for your beautiful questions.

So,

Love you very much.

Bye-bye.