Welcome to today's talk on facing the unexpected waves that accompany unwanted physical health changes.
Whether you're here because you've had a recent diagnosis,
Noticed a gradual decline in your physical health abilities,
Or maybe you're dealing with an unrelenting or mysterious health situation that you just can't seem to get the bottom of,
The first thing I want to tell you is that you are not alone,
At least in the global sense,
But you are alone in its immediate experience.
After all,
Only you can feel the throbbing of your head or the constant ache in your lower back.
It's all on you.
Your physical health is just that,
Yours.
I want to talk about three primary stages that people experience when facing unwanted physical health changes.
First,
Let's talk about the experience of initial reactions that coincide with the whirlwind of emotions.
This unwelcome health journey often begins at the part of denial.
Here you ignore symptoms or changes and tell yourself,
Nope,
This is not happening,
And you do your damnedest to keep on keeping on.
Or maybe you find yourself floating in a pit of sadness.
You feel an overwhelming sense of flatness,
Causing you to just shut down and numb out.
If only I could pause the world for a little while.
These are natural internal defense mechanisms.
Think of them kind of like a buffer.
It's a way to shield yourself from what you don't want to see or deal with.
But as the waves grow stronger,
You could find yourself swept into the turbulent waters of anger.
Why me?
I don't deserve this,
As if anyone does.
Nonetheless,
It's an understandable outcry,
A reaction to the perceived injustice that you are experiencing.
Denial,
Sadness,
And anger,
In the short term,
All act like a buffer.
This gives you time to assimilate what you're experiencing.
Now,
This is not a bad thing,
But it is important to not stay stuck there.
And the storm of recognition doesn't end there.
Fear,
At some point,
Can take the helm and panic and set in.
And when it does,
Your concerns can blow way out of proportion.
In these moments,
Your ship seems to be sinking.
Life,
As you know it,
Is over.
You end up feeling lost at sea.
And some people actually say the words,
I'm all at sea.
These initial reactions are not a linear experience.
Some people go from one stage to another,
While some go directly to just one or two.
I've found,
However you react to any unwanted life change,
It's exactly how you react to an unwanted health circumstance.
Me,
I tend to jump right to sadness.
No denial,
No anger,
And only a small bit of fear.
Fortunately,
I don't stay there for too long.
But that's where I find myself when I encounter yet another phase of physical decline.
Now,
Considering I live with a lifelong degenerative neuromuscular disease,
I have encountered many unwanted phases of physical decline.
Really,
It's all about resistance.
Recognizing your particular state of resistance is like a lighthouse guiding you back to safety.
It's a call alerting you to shift forward,
To embrace,
You know,
A get-real attitude towards the health changes steering your course.
Once I recognize that I'm swimming in a thinking-induced state of sadness,
I work to snap myself forward to let go of my emotional focus and get real.
And that brings me to the second stage,
Reality.
Navigating through the choppy waters of health changes requires a clear view of the horizon.
It's time to review your situation realistically.
You need to narrow down to remove your emotions and determine what are the facts.
This is a good time to be an observer and chart what's happening.
Understanding the scope of your health changes involves identifying trigger factors and looking for patterns,
However small.
Saying things like,
I don't feel right,
Or something is wrong with me,
Won't get you very far in the health care system.
Review your chart or journal over a period of time,
And this will help you conduct a clear assessment of your changing abilities.
Pinpoint what you can and cannot do,
And then that helps you to determine what's truly important to you.
This step is your compass,
Directing your efforts and energy toward what matters most to you.
Once you have a firm sense of your priorities,
You can move toward taking action.
And this brings us to the third stage,
Planning your reset.
I would highly recommend you avoid Dr.
Google.
Instead,
Research from reputable sources to become well informed about your health condition.
Knowledge is your power and your sail.
It is what will catch the winds of change and propel you forward.
But don't sail this sea alone.
Reach out for support from professionals who can navigate these waters with you.
It's important to learn to advocate for yourself in an effective manner.
You may not want to hear this,
But it's important to remember,
In the vast ocean of health care,
You are a file number.
Your physicians exist to help you,
But at the end of the day,
You have to be the captain of your own ship.
Another thing to consider is to work on your mood and mindset.
Trust me,
Your mind is the rudder that steers your life ship,
And when unwelcome health shows up,
You need to work with it to ensure you stay on a forward-moving course.
Cultivating a positive outlook and fueling your sense of resilience will make all the difference.
There's no guarantee for smooth sailing,
But your journey will be easier if you practice self-compassion and unconditional acceptance.
It is what it is.
