Meeting And Nourishing Resistance

We need a certain amount of resistance for stability, for holding, and for inquiry about carrying resistance and letting resistance go. In this guided meditation, we connect with awareness of earth as a source of resistance and where we are holding resistance in our being.

Transcript

Hello.

Thank you for joining me for this guided meditation on meeting resistance.

Most of us are going to encounter resistance at some point in our own being.

Sometimes we're saying no to something that is real and present right here in the moment that we need to hold on to.

And sometimes we've developed some habits of resistance,

Even if what we're resisting is no longer true or present or helpful for us to be resisting.

In this practice,

I am interested in noticing how resistance is part of our wholeness and how we can choose to be with resistance,

To let resistance go,

And to develop it.

If this sounds interesting to you,

Then let's check out this practice together.

Touching earth or touching something that touches earth,

Send your awareness to how you are part of this earth and how earth supports your whole being.

Let's breathe with this awareness for a little while.

When you feel tuned into your awareness of connection with and support by earth,

Start to turn your awareness to where you're holding resistance.

Where is resistance held in your being?

What qualities are connected to these resistances?

Breathe with noticing where you're holding resistance for a while and the qualities,

How they differ,

How they're similar,

How you come to develop them into an awareness called resistance until you go curious about one of the areas.

A genuine,

Generous curiosity starts to open doors in resistant spaces and times.

When I am resisting something or some being and I met with a genuine,

Generous curiosity about why and what's happening and have a sense that this person really truly would like to get to know me better,

I have a much easier time shifting my immediate resistance.

The qualities of my resistance self-change in the face of a genuine and generous curiosity.

This is the kind of curiosity we can seek to develop in ourselves.

Once curious about the resistance you are holding,

Perhaps you invite the resistance to greater presence and awareness.

This can be a little bit scary if we have been taught that resistance is a bad thing or that we should be afraid of it.

Let's try to embrace the resistance as a potentially neutral thing until we understand it better.

So now we can notice not only the location in our being and the qualities of that resistance.

Are they habitual?

Thick?

Thin?

Full of color?

Devoid of color or fragrance?

Weighty?

Light?

Crispy?

Sludgy?

Or some other qualities?

We can also become more aware of why as we know the location and the qualities and develop this genuine and generous curiosity.

Resistance is both often protective and habitual.

What are we protecting ourselves from or what have we developed habits of protecting ourselves from?

Are these perceived threats true and real and present now?

That's a lot of different components.

They could be true or untrue.

They could be real or imaginary.

They could be present or present sometime in the past or never present at all.

Sometimes we choose resistance as protection and sometimes we have developed resistance as protective habits.

Sometimes there are immediate threats and in the case of immediate threat perhaps you need your resistance and this is not the moment to try and change it.

This practice works best when we don't have immediate threats.

As we breathe with our learning about the resistance that we're holding we might notice that we have some choices.

Perhaps you wish to keep your resistance and maybe even strengthen it.

This might be particularly true if you're resisting a present threat.

Or perpetuating one or one that you encounter on a regular basis.

Perhaps you want to soften your resistance or even release it.

This might be more likely if the resistance has become a habit from the past.

It's not being helpful in this moment and or.

It was never helpful but we developed a habit around it anyway or even a loyalty to it.

There are lots of choice points between these decisions and probably choices I have not imagined but you can.

Now as we continue breathing we're practicing discernment,

Holding our choices,

Our potentials and imagining what flows from pursuing one of those choices.

Possibly comparing them and how they might feel.

Choices are consequential and so are non-choices.

As Shantideva wrote,

The trees and the wind do not need to make direct decisions to carry the fire but they will have consequences when fire meets trees and wind.

And sometimes we end up reacting out of those kinds of elemental conditions and conditioning.

In the conditioning we have choices to change that.

So that we feel less like a forest fire and more like a person choosing to care for the forest to prevent the fires from happening.

And when we meet one,

Taking care of the fire safely before it gets too large.

This is the practice of discernment.

Perhaps imagine four choices.

Do you have the resourcing and tools to carry out each of the choices?

If not,

Reduce the number of choices.

Do you have the skills to carry out the remaining choices?

And to carry them out well?

This requires some honesty and some release of ego sometimes.

I might like to believe that I am equally skillful in all situations and the truth is I am not.

Most of us aren't.

Once the number of choices available to us has been reduced again to those that we have the tools and resources for and those we have the skills to carry through at least trying to do then of the remaining choices which ones will have the best outcomes in relationship to our values of compassion,

Generosity,

Interconnectedness,

Justice,

Truthfulness,

And any other values that you feel are important to include.

Perhaps you still have more than one choice in front of you to try out.

At this point we would select the one that feels easiest,

Most accessible,

Or best.

As we continue to do this practice we may eventually arrive at a decision that we wish to try.

If you decide you need to strengthen your resistance you might ask yourself how you could do this in helpful,

Supportive,

And non-harming ways.

If you decide you need to keep your resistance what are the most nurturing ways to hold this so the resistance protects but does not harm you or others?

If you are choosing softening around your resistance how can you encourage softness,

Easing,

Or more permeability?

If you are choosing releasing resistance how can you honor the resistance and how will it let go?

Are there physical movements that might accompany your decisions?

This is the developing of a plan of action.

If this plan requires you to leave the guided meditation then you may want to return to the practice later to check in and see how it went.

If the practice does not require you to go anywhere you might continue to breathe and work with the practice that you have developed.

Even when practices fail or are only modestly successful we can learn from them and learn to develop new skills and understanding.

Usually,

The learning is not,

Well,

I'll never do that again.

Although we might have learned that kind of resistance in response to past criticisms or situations.

Sometimes it's a lot of effort to recognize all the different ways we might be resisting or have habits of resistance such as,

Well,

I'll never do that again or that's just not me or some other kinds of totalizing thoughts like that.

Let's take a few breaths and move gently in our being.

Putting a little bit of stretch.

Noticing how resilient you are as well as how resistant.

As you complete your time with greater awareness of how you are or we're holding resistance perhaps return to awareness of earth.

Earth's solidity offers us resistance as we wheel or walk around allowing us to travel through our lives.

Earth's permeability cleans and stores water,

Nurtures mycelial networks and plants literally allowing us to breathe,

To eat,

To drink and to survive.

Resistance is a practice and like the changing qualities of earth we too can change to employ resistance more skillfully in our lives and to release it most skillfully when needed.

Breathing in and out softly perhaps thank your resistance,

Thank the earth and thank your breath accompanying you in this practice.

I thank you for taking time today to practice and to play and examine a component of being that for many of us is a little uncomfortable or even a lot scary.

Thanks for taking time and to explore some of the resistance in your being and how you might be with it.

For caring for yourself and for nurturing a genuine and generous curiosity about who and how you are.

May you remember you are loved and lovable,

Needed in this world and you already belong and that you,

Your life,

Your choices and your practices have,

Do and will make a difference.

Thank you for joining me for this practice and I wish you a beautiful day until we can practice again.

Reviews

Brilliant, kind guidance.
Affirming and much needed. 🙏
Choices are our strength.