Welcome.
I don't know whether you're new to journaling or a pro or whether it's something you pick up for a while and then let it go.
This audio reflection is for you.
You may also currently be in the midst of cancer treatment.
You may be awaiting treatment to start or you may be out the other side slowly recovering and healing.
I've been on that journey.
I'm currently 18 months out of treatment and continue to heal and to recover.
Recovery is not done once treatment ends.
To my mind,
It's the beginning of the road where we face the emotional,
Mental and physical fallout.
It takes time.
It really does take time and please take that time for yourself.
This can't be rushed.
Journaling has been part of my life for about 15 years now I reckon.
There are times I've journaled every morning and other times when I've let it go but I always come back to it.
For me,
It's a comfort.
It's a place where I get to bear my innermost thoughts and feelings.
It's a place I often ask questions or I dream or I play or I get things off my chest or I rage.
It's a place I try to make sense of my life,
My life and all that I've experienced.
And during particularly dark times,
It has been a lifeline for me.
Sometimes I write pages,
Other times a few sentences.
There is no right or wrong way to journal.
So I'm guessing as you're listening to this recording,
You're curious about what journaling through cancer might be like and whether it could help you process your emotions and perhaps bring you some clarity.
So let me just share how journaling helped me and actually continues to help and support me.
When I was first diagnosed or rather when I was waiting for biopsy results,
I turned to my journal and I poured out onto the page all my fears and worries.
I wrote a lot of questions that I wasn't in a position to answer.
I wrote about my greatest,
Deepest fears.
I wanted to get it out of my head and onto the page.
And I saw it as a way to free up space in my already super busy mind.
It helped as much as it could.
And there were times that I kind of had a dialogue with myself.
There was one side of me that was the super overwhelmed,
Running away with all sorts of stories that my brain was making up.
And then on the other side,
There was the calm me,
The one that was focusing on what I knew to be true at that point.
And this dialogue between the two sides really did help.
I hope that some of that sounds familiar.
Journaling offered me this space for my thoughts.
And when I was going through treatment,
I wrote or I kept kind of more of a diary really than a journal.
A few lines a day,
How I was feeling physically and also mentally.
So much of the time whilst I was going through chemo,
I didn't have the energy for much more than that.
But I'm really glad that even on my lowest days,
I managed to write a couple of sentences.
It served as a reminder that even those really desperate days that I'd come through them,
And I was able to read back when I was feeling brighter and see that actually I had come through those really dark days.
We are so much more resilient than we believe.
And it's good to be able to reflect back on that.
And I now journal to support my recovery,
To explore how different my life feels and is now.
I explore themes like resilience and self-compassion.
That's a big one.
Still fears and also boundaries and how I wish to spend this one wild and precious life as the wonderful poet Mary Oliver urges us.
So let's take some time now to pause with a notebook and pen.
And I urge you to use a notebook and pen.
There is something so tactile about writing by hand and something that is lost,
I feel,
When we're on a laptop.
For me,
Certainly,
I'm so much slower when I write by hand.
And this gives me the chance to be open to the experience,
To give myself that time.
And I hope you'll try that.
Okay,
So if you've got a paper and pen and notebook and pen,
Then let's pause for a moment.
Take time to settle somewhere that you're comfortable.
Take a few breaths,
Slow them down,
And become aware of your surroundings,
Grounding yourself into this moment.
I offer you the following gentle prompts,
Wherever you find yourself today on your journey through cancer.
Write them down one at a time.
And if you have time now,
Then pause the audio after I've read them out.
If not,
Then listen to them and commit to setting aside some time a little later on to reflect on them.
This is precious time.
So here are the questions.
What emotions am I carrying today,
And how can I honor them?
What emotions am I carrying today,
And how can I honor them?
What small amount of beauty or gratitude can I hold on to,
Especially when I'm struggling?
And the last one,
Which is one I have used so many times.
What would I say to a dear friend going through what I am going through right now?
What would I say to a dear friend going through what I am going through right now?
What would I say to a dear friend going through what I am going through right now?
So if you are able,
Pause the audio now and give yourself that time.
I'll be waiting when you press play again.
So how did you get on?
Go gently with yourself today.
All sorts of emotions can be released when we journal.
And I urge you to take exquisite care of yourself through this whole process.
Spending time journaling really is an act of self-compassion,
And this is how we heal.
And remember,
You can come back to these prompts,
These questions,
As often as you need to.
Feel you need to or you would like to.
Daily,
Weekly,
Monthly,
Whatever suits you best,
They're going to be here for you.
I'm sending you so much love,
And do let me know how you get on.
Bye for now.
