So this can be a challenging concept to understand or directly experience and really accept but I just want to plant the seed and maybe it can be something that you can reflect on and notice within your own practice.
Pain either emotional or physical and suffering is not the same thing.
Pain is the uncomfortable sensations in the body and suffering is how we react to that in the body.
Over our lifetime we develop a very habitual pattern of reaction to painful sensations in the body which we normally just bundle into one package and call it pain but we can begin to break this habitual pattern of reaction if we start to separate the uncomfortable sensations in the body and our reaction to that.
It doesn't mean that this will take the pain completely away but it will somehow allow you to live with it more easily with more peace.
It's important to know that we don't particularly want to change our reaction to pain because this can lead to more inner conflict,
Wanting how we are to always be a different way.
It's more about allowing and softening around so a much more compassionate approach.
Our reaction to any processes arising and moving through is to freeze around them to contract naturally because we don't want them to be there,
It's uncomfortable.
So we contract around it to try and make it go away which is often quite unconscious or we try to dissociate from it or repress it but there is still contraction there.
And this contraction or freezing process is quite a wide spectrum from very obvious physical tension and contraction in the body and in the muscles to a very subtle energetic holding.
If we look at this from an energetic perspective when we freeze or contract around something we try to hold the unfolding processes still or away but these energetic processes need to unfold as my mentor Rob says in their natural unfolding course.
So if we can begin to let it unfold in the way that it needs to it can ease how we feel.
But I guess the question could be how do we let energy unfold?
We need to allow a whole system to soften,
Relax and open out,
Which allows the energy processes moving through to unfold and liberate.
An analogy that I often like to use is steam.
Steam is a movement of energy created by heat.
You can clearly see this movement of energy because of the water vapor within it.
If you imagine a pot of boiling water on the stove,
If there is no lid on the pot,
The steam can easily take its natural unfolding course and by doing this the energy of it naturally dissipates away into the space around.
If you were to put a lid on the pot of boiling water representing the freezing or holding process what would happen?
The energy wanting to and needing to unfold and liberate would get held down and this will lead up to a build-up in pressure or even some kind of explosion.
Very similarly,
If we can allow unfolding processes of pain to move through the body,
Either emotional or physical,
And allow them to unfold and liberate,
There is a sense of ease with the whole process.
If we freeze or contract around our experiences,
Holding that energy down,
It leads to suffering,
Maybe in the form of strong emotions coming through,
Anxiety,
Depression,
Anger,
Or whatever it may be.
So this is from an energetic perspective.
If we look at it from a more somatic perspective,
It's about deeply relaxing the body and releasing tension in the body,
So just allowing.
As psychotherapist Carl Jung said,
What we resist persists.
This might take a little while to get used to because it's quite against the habitual pattern that we've learned over our lifetime,
But it really begins to ease how much we suffer from pain in our life.
My teacher Rob likes to talk about lubrication,
So just allowing yourself to be lubricated,
Allowing the processes to just move through easily,
Without getting stuck or getting caught on them.
There's a metaphor that's often used,
Be like a riverbank.
So if you can feel grounded and stable enough in the body,
And just let the energy processes move through the body,
Like a river flows through a riverbank.
But often people don't have direct access to movement of energy or can't directly experience it yet.
So at this stage in your path,
If you find that this is the case for you,
That's totally okay.
It doesn't mean that you're a rubbish meditator or anything like that.
Everyone is just different.
Everyone finds different aspects in the path of meditation more easy or more difficult.
If you're someone that can easily be aware of the energy processes moving through the body,
That's great,
But if not,
I want to do a quick exercise with you.
If you get yourself really comfortable in whatever position is good for you,
And just gently close your eyes,
And begin to allow yourself to rest.
Not worrying about anything you need to do for the moment,
Just resting and relaxing.
Supported by the awareness of the breath coming in and out.
Now think of a situation in your life that is causing you suffering or pain.
And let that situation really arise.
Let yourself really be there.
Now let go of any concepts or reflections or thoughts around the situation.
Just notice how it feels in your body right now.
Noticing any sensations in your body.
Any tension or holding.
How the space of your body feels.
Just anything you notice.
Now take a nice long,
Deep breath in.
And let a long,
Slow breath come out.
Releasing tension.
And take another deep,
Slow breath in,
Filling the lungs.
And let a slow breath come out.
And as you breathe out,
Notice how your body releases and relaxes.
Another deep,
Slow breath in.
And breathing a long,
Slow breath out.
And letting your body really soften,
Relax,
And open out.
One more time,
A deep,
Full breath in.
And a long,
Extended breath out.
Allowing the body to deeply relax and soften and open out.
Releasing any tension.
Letting go.
Relaxing.
Now for me,
Notice how it feels in your body right now.
Does it feel different to how it did before?
Notice the space of your body.
Any sensations,
Feelings,
Energy,
Etc.
In the body.
And then when you're ready,
You can gently open your eyes.
If you felt any difference in your body between the beginning and the end of the exercise,
It's because your energy was different.
Your energy had changed.
Where there is energy,
There is feeling.
And where there is feeling,
There is energy.
So even if you feel you might not be able to directly notice the unfolding of energy,
It is still unfolding and transforming.
By releasing inner tension,
Letting yourself soften energetically and physically,
It allows that energy to be liberated.
So instead of trying to escape the pain or push it away,
You're being the riverbank and allowing the waters of the energy to flow through,
Easing the amount that you suffer.
Again,
It's not about pushing the pain away or trying to escape it or dissociate from it.
It's about allowing,
Letting it take its natural unfolding course and liberate,
Allowing you to find some sense of peace within and easing your suffering.
Keep releasing the steam instead of building up in pressure and leading to a more explosive reaction or a situation that is too powerful for us to handle.
In the beginning,
This is something that might take a conscious effort to do.
You might need to consciously go through the process in meditation or in your daily life.
But in time with practice,
Like most things,
You will find that you are much more naturally and automatically and subtly allow a sense of softening,
Allowing the energy to unfold naturally and to liberate,
Bringing much less suffering and a greater sense of peace so that you can still get on with your life even when you're in pain.
Thank you.
