RAIN Meditation: Tools For Self-Support

Welcome to this 30-minute guided meditation centered on R.A.I.N.- Emotional Intelligence techniques! These practices teach us to allow our emotions, rather than hiding them, pretending they aren’t there, avoiding or pushing them onto others.
Through this meditation, we’ll take time for introspection and how we can cultivate a gentle attention toward our emotional patterns to respond with care and intention.
Whether you're looking to deepen your meditation practice or simply wish to create a more mindful approach to life, this practice will guide you in aligning with the 4 Pieces of R.A.I.N. As always, this meditation is perfect for both beginners and experienced practitioners.

Transcript

Morning everyone.

My name is Larissa and we're going to practice together for about 30 minutes.

Some opportunity as always just to slow down,

Spend a little time with yourself.

And as always,

Just taking these first few moments to settle into your body,

Take a couple of deep breaths,

Grab a pillow,

Grab a blanket,

Open a window,

Whatever it is that you need to support yourself to start to get settled into your practice.

And as you're getting situated,

You might close your eyes,

You might set your gaze downward.

It's opening your inner eye,

Opening to this opportunity to just be still with yourself.

And as you settle,

Just remembering there's no forcefulness in it.

You don't have to settle down.

Sometimes that has a negative connotation.

Settle down.

You're a little bit too much.

It's just removing any processes that make you feel like you're supposed to be a certain way.

Just allowing yourself to land in your chair,

On your cushion.

Perhaps you're standing on your feet.

Perhaps you're driving.

Wherever you are,

You are right here with you.

Sometimes that can be challenging.

But there's this opportunity to get to know the part of you that is warm and tender and open and supportive.

Some mornings,

Some days,

Some seasons,

That part of you feels close.

You feel connected to that part.

Some mornings,

Some days,

Some seasons,

That part feels far away.

Maybe you wonder if it exists.

But the reason that I believe that it exists is because you're breathing,

Because I'm breathing,

Because breath is moving through us,

Which means there's still a purpose to this life that we live.

And when we lose our breath,

We start to remember how important it is to breathe.

Or when we lose a loved one,

It doesn't mean their purpose ends,

But we get to carry it with us.

There's this opportunity in slowing down that's beyond the simplicity of noticing breath,

But it is as important as just noticing your breath.

You just hear,

In this present moment,

What does my breath feel like?

And in that curiosity,

We honor the life-giving that we are receiving right now with our breath.

We are honoring all of the grasses,

The greenery,

All of the makeup of the oxygen that we get to breathe that has been created and then shared over a millennia,

And by the tree right outside my door.

And just beginning with that remembering of connection,

Remembering of reciprocity,

Just land in your body here.

What does it feel like to take this breath?

In this slowing down,

You can start to notice sensations,

Feelings,

All of the different pieces and parts of us,

And we can start to tend to ourselves.

It's very often we're tending externally to responsibilities,

To humans,

Plants,

All of these things that we have that are important to us to care for.

And it's also true that you are given one vehicle in life that carries you through,

And it's this body.

And this body carries around your spirit,

Your essence.

So tending to yourself is just as important as all of the other things that we tend to.

And not to create a hierarchy,

But sometimes it's actually more important to draw your hand back from all of its held responsibilities and just place it on your heart and remember,

I can't take care of all of those responsibilities if I don't take care of also this vehicle.

This body that I get to move through the earth within.

This body that allows me a delightful sensory awareness of hearing a drop of rain,

Of tasting a delightful meal,

Of touching a loved one,

Feeling their warmth,

Or holding their sorrow within.

This body is always tending to you,

Always organizing towards health.

Even when we feel pain,

It's our body telling us,

Hey,

I need a little support.

Hey,

I need a little help.

I need a little tending.

Whether that's emotional pain or physical pain,

Those tiny little sufferings like a hangnail or those capital S sufferings like grief.

So our body is sharing with us,

What is it that we need in this moment to tend?

Very often,

It's just the simplicity of watching your body breathe for you.

It's that gentle care that's always happening.

Okay,

And just receive that for a few moments here.

Just receiving that gift of breath.

I don't have to do anything.

I don't have to earn it.

I don't have to prove to anybody.

Although sometimes there's a voice in the back of my mind that says,

Maybe I do need to prove.

But your body doesn't care.

Your body just breathes.

Just receiving that.

Just receiving this gift of breath.

And as we practice receiving breath and just noticing those little sensations that come with it,

Practice appreciating just the simplicity of breathing.

We also start to strengthen our ability to feel other things.

Sometimes we kind of cut ourselves at the neck and live in our head because feeling can be challenging.

We're just busy.

We're just moving to the next thing and we just miss the sensation,

Subtle sensation that your body is asking for some small attention.

And rather than waiting until our body has to grab our attention with a pain point or strong emotion or a jaw so tight,

It's giving us a headache.

We get to listen to our body's wisdom in a little bit more subtlety.

Sometimes it's pleasant.

Sometimes it's neutral.

Sometimes it's unpleasant.

Those are just three broad categories in the Buddhist tradition of meditation.

It's called feeling tone.

Is it pleasant?

Is it neutral?

Is it unpleasant?

Very often we're more aware of pleasant and unpleasant.

There's also a lot of neutral.

Receiving the breath can feel neutral.

When we infuse a little bit of appreciation,

All of a sudden it can feel pleasant.

Sometimes we're noticing our breath and we get a little agitated or we get a little bored and then it's unpleasant.

There's just this gliding.

There's no staying unpleasant forever.

Although there's usually some part of our brain that hopes that that is true,

But it's not possible to stay unpleasant forever.

We're just allowing these little slides and fluctuations.

In that,

We just naturally start to work with this RAIN concept.

Recognize and receive,

To acknowledge and allow,

And then sometimes to inquire about,

Not just to follow the story,

Although sometimes walking through the story can be helpful.

The story of the emotion,

The story of why this emotion is here,

That we don't want to get too caught up in that step of inquiry.

The inquiry is more about where do I feel this in my body?

It's when I think that thought,

What does my jaw do?

When I feel that pain sensation fully,

What is it that my body is asking for?

Just this gentle inquiry with curiosity rather than judgment.

And then how do I nurture myself as I walk through that process?

Am I nurturing myself by just settling and receiving?

I might need to nurture myself by repeating multiple times,

It's okay that I'm feeling this way.

It's okay that I'm feeling this way.

It's normal and natural to be feeling this way.

Sometimes the nurturing is,

I need to just move my knee a little.

Maybe I need to rub my leg a little.

Maybe I need to stand up for a moment.

There's a million ways that we can work with this process of just recognizing,

Acknowledging any emotional sensation,

Recognizing and acknowledging any pain point,

Any pleasure point.

Sometimes we investigate,

We inquire.

We don't want that investigative quality to become,

I must know why.

That pulls us away from the present.

Just that gentle inquiry.

Is there any insight here?

Is there some story I'm telling myself that's causing that pain point to just linger longer?

Can I inquire about the story?

I wonder if I could have done something different and I learn from it rather than ruminate on it and beat myself up for it.

I'm just always going back to that nurturing part.

How do I nurture myself right now?

Maybe it's just suddenly back in my chair and unhooking from the thought for a moment and just allowing my breath to rhythmically soothe me again.

Step by step,

Breath by breath.

You don't have to remember all of those steps.

It's a natural fluctuation and flow.

What's not always natural though is when you're holding space for those difficult emotions.

It's just a titration.

It's like,

Oh,

Yep.

I'm feeling that pain point of that argument that I had.

I don't need to follow the story of the argument or fix it or change it.

I'm just feeling that tension in my chest.

Let me take a deep breath.

It's feeling a little bit too hard to hold right now.

Let me just readjust.

I don't need to stick with it for too long.

Just notice my breath again.

Yeah,

That's right.

My body's right here breathing for me.

We get that moment of unhooking and then we can choose if we want to dive in again or just choosing again.

Oh,

Yeah,

That's right.

I'm just noticing my breath.

Our brain might want to hook us again.

We're like,

Oh,

Yep.

Nope.

I'm pausing.

I'm just noticing my breath right now.

Thank you for knocking,

Brain.

I'm just noticing my breath.

Very often,

We're in these broad spaces of neutrality,

Not particularly pleasant,

Particularly unpleasant.

Depending on our mood,

Sometimes neutrality lends to unpleasant no matter what's happening.

Sometimes our mood lends to a little bit of pleasantness in that neutrality no matter what's happening.

It's just remembering that emotions move and shift and they just are simply asking to be felt.

There's a consideration in some schools of looking at this form of meditation,

But also just this emotions that we have as a human,

That the feeling is the label,

The emotion is the sensation in the body.

Whatever the concept is,

We're working with the present,

Working with what we're experiencing in the moment.

Neutral lending into pleasantness,

We can work with.

Receiving and allowing.

Oh,

Yeah,

I'm just receiving right now and that feels easeful.

I'm allowing.

This allowance feels easeful.

When neutrality lends into unpleasantness,

We might move instead of receiving and allowing,

Just recognizing and acknowledging.

It's two very similar forms.

Some might say they're exactly the same.

They might feel just a tiny bit different.

Sometimes allowance feels difficult when we're feeling challenging emotions.

We're not allowing someone to harm us.

We're not allowing our own mind to continue beating us up with the story of it.

We're just allowing that emotion to be here.

I see you.

But instead of seeing a strong emotion like a storm cloud that's going to cover us and chase us,

Perhaps piercing us with lightning or trapping us in a storm.

It's this idea that these strong emotions might be like a child that's crying and asking for attention and they just want to be wrapped up and held.

It's usually easier to wrap up and hold the emotion that feels joyful,

That brings a smile to our face easily.

But can we also wrap up and hold those emotions that are telling us there's pain points in our body,

In our hearts,

In our warp?

And that inquiry,

That gentle curiosity that we bring with us is not to fix or change ourselves,

But just to inquire about the sensation in my body and nurture that sensation.

Maybe I want to tuck my knees up and just hold myself for a moment.

Maybe I've got a lot of excited energy and I just want to stand up and stretch out.

You don't have to force yourself to stay in a particular position just because you're in a meditation.

But there's also a wisdom in staying long enough that you learn what it is that your body needs.

Sometimes we can stay through a pain point and recognize,

Oh,

You know what?

I actually moved through that.

I held it long enough and now I can soften and set it down and it's not going to come knocking again.

Things like grief are going to come knocking again and again and again because they require our gentle and kind attention,

Not our forcefulness.

It's recognizing,

Acknowledging,

Receiving and allowing,

Inquiring with curiosity and nurturing ourselves to the best of our ability.

It truly is breath by breath.

Remembering too,

I'm just going to let my body tend to me.

I don't have to ask my heart to beat,

It just beats.

And as it beats,

It massages my lungs and my lungs massage back as I breathe in and out.

And that is all beautifully happening within me.

And can I just receive that?

Breath by breath,

Allowing yourself to feel how you feel,

Receiving all of this information from your body,

Your environment,

Tending to yourself,

Nurturing yourself with as much kindness as possible.

It's breath by breath.

And I'll share here,

Many of you have heard this before,

This is one of my favorite poems from one of my favorite poets,

John O'Donohue.

It's called A Blessing for One Who is Exhausted.

In the first half,

It's about those difficult times,

Difficult emotions,

Difficult seasons.

And the second half is this practice of receiving and allowing,

This practice of nurturing ourselves.

When the rhythm of the heart becomes hectic,

Time takes on the strain until it breaks.

Then all of the unattended stress falls in on the mind like an endless increasing weight.

The light in your mind becomes dim.

Things you could take in your stride before now become laborsome events of will.

Weariness invades your spirit,

Gravity begins falling inside you,

Dragging down every bone.

The tide you never valued has gone out and you are marooned on unsure ground.

Something within you has closed down and you cannot push yourself back to life.

You have been forced to enter empty time.

The desire that drove you has relinquished.

There is nothing else to do now but rest and patiently learn to receive the self you have forsaken for the race of days.

At first,

Your thinking will darken and sadness take over like listless weather.

The flow of unwept tears may frighten you.

You have traveled too fast or false ground and now your soul has come to take you back.

Take refuge in your senses.

Open up to all the small miracles you rushed through.

Become inclined to watch the way of rain when it falls slow and free.

Imitate the habit of twilight,

Taking time to open the well of color that fostered the brightness of day.

Draw alongside the silence of stone until its calmness can claim you.

Be excessively gentle with yourself.

Learn to linger around someone of ease who feels they have all the time in the world,

Perhaps that someone is you.

Gradually you will return to yourself,

Having learned a new respect for your heart and the joy that dwells far within slow time.

I invite you to bring your hands into any of your closing habits or practices.

Ending with a few loving kindness phrases as we often do.

Just repeating them back as they make sense for you.

Using the word we today,

Including yourself in this sangha,

This community.

Perhaps drawing back and even having an image of the world.

May we slow down and appreciate something today.

May we seek and find that joy that exists inside of us.

When action is needed,

May we choose to move with ease and peace together.

And may the merits of our practice ripple out to benefit all beings.

Now take your time.

Whenever you feel complete,

Take a moment,

Open your eyes,

Thank yourself before you head into the day.

And as always,

Thank you each for being here,

Supporting each other,

Supporting the sangha.

Bring your practice with you into the weekend,

Whatever it looks like.

Three deep breaths before your feet hit the floor.

Just a moment of saying thank you to your body for breathing.

Reviews

Excellent practice! Lovely guidance and plenty of space. Thank you so much!

(There are a couple of audio glitches between 14-15 min mark, just FYI.)