Inner Child Dialogue: The Holiday Wound

This track is part of The Wounds Series, an extension of the Inner Child Dialogues, focusing on the emotional imprints that quietly shape our lives.

This is The Holiday Wound — the wound that forms when the season that was supposed to be joyful was instead marked by conflict, fear, loneliness, or emotional unpredictability. For many, holidays bring up old nervous system memories long before they bring up joy.

In this dialogue, the inner child speaks the truth of what holidays once felt like, and the adult self offers safety, clarity, and new possibilities. Together, we reclaim the season — not by forcing joy, but by honoring what’s real.

To go deeper in this work, please explore my Insight Timer courses: The Path to Self-Love: Healing the Mother Wound and The Path to Wholeness: Healing the Father Wound.

The healing happens in the staying.

Transcript

Hello and welcome to Janergy Healing.

Take a slow breath and let yourself arrive.

Place one hand on your heart and the other on your belly.

Feel the rise and fall of your breath,

Your body telling the truth,

Softly and honestly.

Whisper gently,

I'm safe,

I'm here,

I'm not leaving myself.

This is an inner child dialogue,

A space where we listen to the younger part of ourselves and respond with love,

Safety and truth.

Today,

We meet the holiday wound,

The ache that rises during a season the world insists should be joyful,

But for many of us,

Never felt safe.

Let's begin.

Everyone acted happy,

But I could feel it,

The tension,

The fighting,

The pretending.

I was always waiting for something bad to happen.

Holidays never felt safe to me.

I remember that.

The world said this was a season of joy,

But inside your home,

Joy wasn't the truth.

You learned to smile through fear,

To tiptoe around other people's moods,

To carry feelings that were never yours.

You weren't wrong,

You were aware.

But now everyone loves the holidays,

And I try to,

I try to make everything perfect,

But inside I still feel scared or lonely or sad.

What's wrong with me?

Nothing is wrong with you.

Of course you feel this way.

Your nervous system remembers what your mind has tried to forget.

You learned that celebration meant danger,

That special days meant tension,

That pretending meant survival.

There is nothing wrong with you,

You're remembering.

Why did I always have to be the one to hold it all together?

Why wasn't anyone holding me?

You shouldn't have had to hold so much.

You shouldn't have had to manage other people's emotions or walk on eggshells or hide your fear.

You were a child in a place that didn't feel like childhood.

I'm here now,

And you don't have to pretend for me.

You don't have to perform joy.

You don't have to keep the peace.

You get to feel what's real.

Can it really be different now?

Can the holidays actually feel safe?

Yes,

Because now we choose what holidays mean.

We choose who we spend them with.

We choose what we celebrate,

And we choose what we let in.

And if any emotions want to rise,

Fear,

Grief,

Loneliness,

Even joy,

We will welcome them.

We will give them a safe space to land.

Nothing inside you is too much for me.

Take another slow breath.

Bring both hands over your heart.

Whisper softly,

I create my own sense of safety now.

I choose what holidays mean for me.

I stay with myself.

The past no longer controls our seasons.

We are free to create new traditions,

New meanings,

New experiences,

Ones that honor our heart,

Our truth,

And our inner child.

Rest here for a few breaths.

Know that you are safe.

Know that you are loved.

Namaste.

Reviews

Brought up memories i don't wish to remember. My parents divorced when i was very young. As I grew older and traveled with work, my holidays were very lonely and absent of family or id have to choose which family member to visit. How do you choose? Hard choices, difficult when childhood pain is involved. Holidays should.... be happy ones. So many have chosen to hate one another these days. choosing to love yourself more is my way of dealing.
thank you John - know you're loved.

Omgshhh...... 😭 John, we're you a fly on the wall in the house I grew up in?? Thank you, again, for your gentle, soothing guidance, that gets right into my heart & allows my inner child to release big emotions. 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

Oh yes this was my xmas growing up. Atleast until my parents split up. Still don't care about holidays. We don't have the same holidays in Sweden. But the family drama is the same where ever you live. Same patterns within the dysfunctional families. I have made my own traditions, I do not spend time with people or family I can't stand.
This talk is so spot on.
Thank you again John for your clarity and ability to put the pain in words. Much appreciated 🙏💗✨️