The Fastest Way To End Suffering

Suffering is a part of life, but it doesn’t have to be permanent. In The Fastest Way to End Suffering, we explore powerful strategies for transforming pain and hardship into opportunities for growth and peace. Through thought-provoking discussions, practical tools, and insightful wisdom, this episode reveals how we can break free from cycles of suffering by shifting our mindset, embracing present-moment awareness, and choosing healing over victimhood. Whether you’re facing emotional turmoil, stress, or life’s inevitable challenges, this podcast offers a clear path to ending suffering faster and living with greater peace, freedom, and joy. Tune in and discover how to heal and move forward.

Transcript

Have you ever felt like life just keeps throwing you curveballs?

Like no matter what you do,

There's this underlying frustration or disappointment that keeps popping up.

Maybe it's your relationships or work or even just how the day unfolds and you think,

Why can't things just go right for once?

Well,

Here's the kicker.

What if I told you that most of that stress and suffering isn't caused by the situations themselves but by something happening within you?

And no,

This isn't some blame yourself kind of thing.

It's good news because it means you have the power to change it.

That's what we're diving into today.

I'm going to share a mindset shift so simple yet so profound that it could completely transform how you experience your day-to-day life.

And it starts with one idea,

One swap really.

Trade your expectations for appreciation.

That's it.

But don't let the simplicity fool you.

This is the key to ending a lot of the pain and frustration we feel in life.

And here's what's wild.

This isn't just about thinking happy thoughts.

This is about reclaiming your power.

About rewiring the way you react to life's challenges so you stop being at the mercy of what goes on around you and start thriving no matter what situation you're facing.

If that sounds too good to be true,

Stick with me because I'm not just going to tell you why it works,

I'm going to show you how it works step by step.

Plus I'm going to share some powerful stories of people who've put this into action showing just how life-changing this mindset can be.

Now let's talk about something we might not think about often.

Expectations.

We all have them right?

Expectations of how our day should go,

How people should treat us,

How events should turn out and when reality doesn't match up.

Oh man,

That's when frustration and suffering kick in.

You know what I'm talking about.

The feeling is universal.

Take a moment to think about what's been bothering you lately.

Maybe it's your spouse not being as thoughtful as you'd hoped,

Your job not progressing the way you imagined or even something as simple as traffic making you late.

All of those emotions,

Stress,

Anger,

Disappointment,

They're tied to expectations.

When reality doesn't meet what you think it should be,

You suffer.

But here's the big question.

What if you could change how you respond?

What if instead of those unmet expectations crushing you,

You used them as fuel for growth?

That's exactly what Nelson Mandela did during his 27 years in prison.

Let's go back to 1962.

Mandela gets imprisoned,

Stripped of his freedom,

Removed from his family and thrown into a tiny jail cell.

If there's ever been a situation that didn't meet expectations,

This was it.

But instead of letting anger and bitterness consume him,

And it easily could have,

He turned it into an opportunity to grow.

Mandela chose appreciation.

He focused on what those years could teach him and how they could prepare him for the incredible journey ahead.

That mindset,

It didn't just help him survive,

It made him one of the most admired leaders in human history.

Now you might be thinking,

Okay but I'm not Nelson Mandela.

Totally get that.

Most of us aren't.

But his story is a reminder of what's possible when you trade frustration for appreciation,

Even in the most extreme circumstances.

What's stopping us from doing the same in our everyday lives?

Here's a challenge I want you to consider.

What if you could flip the script on suffering in real time?

Imagine a moment where you normally get frustrated,

Like when your co-worker drops the ball on a project or when your kids don't listen for the fifth time today.

Instead of letting disappointment take over,

You press pause.

You stop and you think,

What's something I can appreciate here instead?

Yeah I know,

It sounds easier said than done.

But think of it like working out.

The first push-up is always the hardest.

Over time though,

You build strength.

And just like a muscle,

Appreciation is something you can train.

The more you practice,

The easier it gets.

Now this might be starting to click for you,

Or maybe it still feels a little abstract.

So let's make it crystal clear.

The reason appreciation works so powerfully is because it pulls you out of your head and back into the present moment.

And in the present moment,

Suffering can't survive.

It just can't.

Think about the last time you felt genuinely grateful for something.

Maybe it was watching your kid laugh at something silly,

Or feeling the sun hit your face on a quiet morning.

In that moment,

Were you angry?

Stressed?

No.

Gratitude and suffering can't occupy the same space.

It's like trying to stand in two places at once.

It's physically impossible.

Don't believe me.

Let's take another example.

Oprah Winfrey.

You might know her as one of the richest,

Most successful women in the world.

But before all the fame and fortune,

Oprah faced hardship,

Poverty,

Abuse and countless obstacles.

Yet through it all,

She clung to one practice.

Gratitude.

She even keeps a daily gratitude journal,

Listing out things she appreciates every single day.

And she doesn't just credit this practice with helping her survive tough times.

It's what helped her thrive.

So if this works for Oprah,

If it works for Mandela,

What do you think could happen if you made it a habit too?

What if you conditioned yourself to catch those negative thoughts,

The ones tied to unmet expectations,

And replace them with something you appreciate?

The difference?

It's night and day.

Now here's something that surprises people.

Appreciation isn't just about feeling good,

It's also a creative force.

When you shift from complaining about what's missing in your life to appreciating what's already there,

Doors start opening.

New ideas spring into your mind.

Solutions come out of nowhere.

And here's why that matters.

Sometimes a setback isn't really a setback,

It's growth in disguise.

Thomas Edison's lab burned to the ground in 1914,

Years of work up in flames.

But instead of spiralling into despair,

Edison looked at the ashes and said,

Thank goodness all our mistakes just burned up.

That attitude,

The ability to reframe adversity from a loss into an opportunity,

That's the same mental muscle we're training when we focus on gratitude over frustration.

See,

When you stop clinging tightly to how you think life should be and start appreciating life as it is,

You open up space for something better.

Maybe right now you're shaking your head thinking,

Okay,

Fine,

I get it.

Gratitude is powerful.

But what about life's big problems?

Loss,

Heartbreak,

Failure?

How can I apply this there?

Great question,

And we're going there.

But let me leave you with one thought before we continue.

What if even the hardest moments,

Weren't here to hurt you,

But to guide you?

Loss,

Heartbreak,

Failure.

I know what you're thinking.

How am I supposed to feel grateful for that?

And honestly,

I get it.

These aren't things anyone wants to go through.

But here's the perspective shift that can make all the difference.

Even those painful moments carry within them a lesson,

A spark,

An opportunity to grow.

Let's look at Maya Angelou for a moment.

Her life wasn't easy.

She faced poverty,

Racism and trauma.

Yet through all of it,

She held on to gratitude,

Even in the darkest moments.

One of her most famous sayings was,

I can be changed by what happens to me,

But I refuse to be reduced by it.

That's the power of appreciation in action.

She didn't ignore her pain,

But she found meaning in it,

Used it to grow,

And built an extraordinary life because of it.

I'm not saying you need to feel good about bad things as they happen.

That's not realistic.

But what if,

In the middle of the mess,

You could pause for a second and ask,

What's the gift here?

What might this be teaching me?

You don't have to have answers yet.

The important thing is just asking the question.

That's how you start to open the door to appreciation,

Even in tough times.

Here's the thing.

When we resist what's happening in our lives,

When we fight reality with all our might,

All we're doing is creating more suffering.

It's like holding on to a barbed wire rope.

The harder you cling,

The more it hurts.

But when you relax your grip,

Even just a little,

The pain starts to ease.

Suddenly,

There's space to feel something beyond frustration or anger.

This brings us to one of the most life-changing habits out there.

Training your mind to return to a beautiful state.

You've probably had moments like this before.

Times when life felt so good,

So complete,

Even if just for a second.

Maybe it was while listening to your favourite song,

Laughing with a friend,

Or watching the sunset.

In those moments,

You weren't dwelling on what wasn't going right.

You were fully present,

Fully alive.

That's the beautiful state.

And yeah,

It's more than possible to live there every day.

But here's the truth.

Your mind isn't naturally wired for this.

Left unchecked,

It's more likely to focus on worries,

Fears,

And what's missing.

Why?

Because your brain's entire job is to keep you alive,

And it thinks preparing for the worst is the safest bet.

That's just biology.

The good news?

You're not your brain,

You're the one in charge of training it.

Michael Jordan,

Arguably the greatest basketball player of all time,

Knew this well.

Sure,

He had immense talent,

But his secret weapon was his ability to control his mental state.

Even in the most high-pressure situations,

He trained himself to focus on love for the game,

Instead of the fear of failure.

He chose appreciation for the challenge,

Instead of anxiety over the outcome.

That's how he stayed in his version of a beautiful state,

Even when millions of eyes were watching his every move.

Now,

Your version of a beautiful state might not involve sinking,

Game-winning shots in front of a stadium crowd.

It might look like being patient with your kids when they're testing your limits,

Or staying calm when a work deadline looms.

The point is,

You can catch yourself when your mind starts to spiral into frustration or stress.

You can say,

Nope,

We're not doing this today,

And pivot back toward things that centre you.

Toward the things you appreciate.

Toward that beautiful state.

And here's the wild part.

This isn't just about feeling good.

When you live in a beautiful state,

Your body,

Brain,

And heart function at their absolute peak.

Scientists have even shown that gratitude doesn't just shift your mood.

It also increases your focus,

Creativity,

And resilience.

It literally rewires your brain to perform better.

So yeah,

This isn't just touchy-feely advice.

It's a strategy for becoming your strongest,

Most resourceful self.

Think about it.

If gratitude can pull Maya Angelou from trauma,

Keep Nelson Mandela's strength intact,

And fuel Oprah and Michael Jordan's success,

Imagine what it could do for you.

Imagine walking into every day with that sense of calm and capability,

No matter what life throws at you.

It's not magic,

It's practice,

And you've got everything you need to start.

But let's be real.

This shift doesn't happen overnight.

There will still be moments where frustration creeps in,

Where your expectations get the better of you.

You'll still catch yourself grumbling about the traffic,

The deadlines,

The burnt toast.

And that's okay.

The key isn't being perfect,

It's recognising when you've wandered off course and gently steering yourself back,

Again and again.

So here's how you start.

Right now,

Think of one thing,

Just one,

That you appreciate about your current situation or yourself.

It doesn't have to be deep or profound.

Maybe it's as simple as,

I'm glad I have a roof over my head,

Or I'm proud of the effort I put into today.

Write it down,

Hold on to it,

And when frustration shows up,

And it will,

Use that thought as your anchor.

And once you've done that for a while,

Once you've got the hang of finding these little moments of gratitude,

Try pushing it a step further.

Next time you catch yourself stuck in traffic or dealing with a tough situation,

Don't just appreciate the easy stuff.

Look for the lesson,

The silver lining,

The unexpected opportunity hiding in your struggle.

With enough practice,

You'll be amazed at how often life's toughest moments end up being its most transformative.

Right now,

As you're listening to this,

You might feel inspired,

Or maybe you're sceptical,

Thinking,

This sounds great but could it actually work for me?

Let me just say this,

You wouldn't still be here listening to this,

If deep down you didn't believe it could work.

Think about that.

Some part of you knows it's possible,

And that's all you need to take the first step.

So let this be your reminder,

You don't have to fix everything at once,

And you don't have to do it perfectly.

Just start small,

Catch yourself in those moments of frustration,

Shift your perspective,

And see what happens when you trade expectation for appreciation.

Keep practicing,

Keep building that muscle,

Because over time it won't just change your days,

It'll change your entire life.

If you enjoyed today's talk,

I believe that you would love our top rated courses here on Insight Timer.

Over 4,

000 students already went through our courses and the responses are amazing.

Our goal here at Healing Waves is to help you on your transformation journey by combining ancient wisdom with modern science.

Thank you for being with me today,

I appreciate you,

And I hope to see you again soon.

Reviews

Inspiring 🦋

🪷🙏🏻 Thank you.

Wow, this has been wonder- ful. Very inspiring. Many thanks for sharing 🙏💛