Welcome to Soulful Journeys,
Transforming trauma and healing lives.
The podcast where we embark on a deeply transformative exploration of the human experience as we navigate the paths of resilience and recovery and renewal,
Guided by stories of triumph and healing.
In each episode,
We'll embark on soulful journeys and now and then I'll be joined by survivors and therapists and healers who've courageously transformed their trauma into sources of strength and wisdom.
Together we'll uncover the power of the human spirit and the tools that can help you to heal and thrive.
I'm your host Belinda and I'm honoured to be your companion on this empowering voyage of self-discovery and growth.
So let's deep dive into the heart of healing.
Today I'd like to talk about metabolising anger.
Anger is often seen as a negative or destructive emotion and one that should be controlled and suppressed at all costs.
But what if I told you that anger,
Like any other emotion,
Actually has its rightful place in our emotional landscape?
Anger,
When understood and processed,
Can be a really powerful catalyst for our healing,
Progression and growth.
So let's explore the relationship between anger and trauma and the misconceptions surrounding anger and the importance of creating that safe space for its expression.
Many of us have learned to associate anger with aggression or danger,
Right?
And this association often begins in childhood when we witness anger being expressed in unhealthy ways by caregivers or key influences or even authority figures.
And as children,
We're incredibly perceptive and we quickly learn that expressing anger can lead to negative consequences.
And this knowledge is what becomes deeply ingrained in our psyche and this is what leads us to suppress our own anger purely as a survival mechanism.
So what are some of the misconceptions surrounding anger?
One is that anger always leads to destructive behaviour.
If you've experienced anger frequently in your awareness or in your environment in childhood or you've had to suppress your anger because as a child you were told children should be seen or not heard or something like that,
It might cause you to grow up to think that anger is always destructive.
And while uncontrolled anger can result in harm,
Anger itself is simply an emotion,
Right?
It's a signal from our body and mind that something is amiss.
It's our response to anger that determines whether it becomes constructive or destructive.
Many people prefer sadness to anger because it feels safer.
Anger can be seen as a threat to our emotional stability,
While sadness is more socially acceptable and for people who've suffered significant childhood trauma,
This tends to be the go-to.
However,
Sadness can also be a way of avoiding the intensity of anger.
It's crucial to recognise that both emotions serve a purpose in our healing journey and both are okay.
Sometimes when you feel that anger brewing,
The tears come and to someone who's been through significant trauma,
The sadness is actually anger but they think it's sadness,
If that makes sense.
And I know that from my own experience.
I'd break out in tears as soon as I feel that anger coming up and I always thought it was just sadness.
I didn't realise it was anger because I'd had to suppress anger so much to avoid being hurt in childhood.
So having that awareness has completely shifted things for me.
Another misconception around anger is that anger is synonymous with blame.
Expressing anger does not always mean blaming someone or something for our feelings.
Anger can be directed at a situation,
An event or even ourselves.
It is an opportunity to examine what boundaries have been crossed and what needs are not being met.
So to truly metabolise anger and use it as a tool for healing,
We must create that safe space for its expression.
And here are some essential steps.
The first one is self-compassion.
Understand that feeling anger is a natural response to life's challenges.
It's okay.
Treat yourself with kindness and compassion as you explore your anger.
And exploring it means to feel it,
Not just intellectualise it and wonder how it might feel.
Get down into your body with it and feel it.
It's okay.
You are safe to do that.
The second one is identify triggers.
Recognise what triggers your anger.
Is it certain situations or people or memories from the past?
Like what is it?
And identifying these triggers can help you gain that insight into the root causes of your anger.
The third one is to seek support.
Consider working with a therapist or a counsellor who specialises in trauma-informed care and emotional regulation.
It's getting down into the body that is important.
And you do that through embodied processing,
Not just talk therapy.
So finding the right support can provide you with that guidance and support that you need to navigate through your anger.
The next one is mindfulness.
Practise mindfulness techniques to stay present with your emotions,
To allow yourself to move through them like a wave and let it find completion.
Mindfulness allows you to observe your anger without judgement and that's what makes it easier to process.
The next one is healthy expression.
Find healthy ways to express your anger.
And this could be journalling or art therapy or physical activity or just talking to a trusted friend.
The key to expressing it constructively is getting it out.
There's no need to hold onto it because it's just going to store in your body.
Anger can be so transformative.
It's giving yourself the time and space to work through it and transform it and it can be instant.
It doesn't have to be this long process.
Expressing anger is a transformative process that can lead to profound healing and personal growth and by understanding that anger is often a trauma response and challenging those misconceptions surrounding it,
We can create this safe space for this powerful emotion.
Remember anger is not your enemy and that can be a tough one for people who've been through significant trauma.
See it as a messenger who,
When listened to and processed,
Can guide you towards a more authentic and empowered life.
So embrace your anger as a catalyst for change and you may find it becomes one of your greatest allies on your healing journey.
Thank you for joining me on another soulful journey.
I hope today's episode has brought you insights and inspiration and a sense of connection.
If you'd like to continue exploring transformative stories and healing practices,
Be sure to subscribe,
Rate and review the podcast.
Remember your journey is uniquely yours and your resilience knows no bounds.
If you have a story that you'd like to share or a topic that you'd like me to explore,
Reach out to me.
Your voice matters and together we can create and nurture that rich and safe container for healing and hope.
Until next time,
May your journey be soulful,
Your heart be light and your healing profound.
This is Soulful Journeys,
Transforming trauma and healing lives.
