What I'm about to share is difficult for me,
But I feel like it's important because it can help other people heal and grow too.
So many of us naturally judge other people,
And it's honestly an instinct or a reflex.
And so many of us also want to let go of judgment because we ourselves don't want to be judged.
But if it were that easy,
We would all let go of that habit.
The truth is,
It's not that easy.
Judgment comes from fear,
And it's hard not to untangle ourselves from it.
So I want to share a story with you.
There is an incident that I had with my dog who I loved with my whole heart and soul.
Anyone who has animals know that they become your children.
Well,
One day,
I got my dog's teeth cleaned,
And to my surprise,
The vet office called and said that her lower front teeth were all broken at the root,
And she needed to get all of them extracted.
My mind started to try to figure out what happened and how those teeth would have been broken like that.
Initially,
I thought of an incident where she got attacked by another dog,
And I placed the blame there.
And for years,
I thought this was true.
But recently,
As my capacity for seeing my own shadows and my own traumas in reality has grown,
The truth emerged.
One day,
I was sitting there,
And the memory hit me.
It was the time where I was driving in the car,
And I slammed on my brakes.
My dog was in the back,
And she flew to the front,
Hitting her mouth on the dashboard.
It's even still so hard to talk about this now.
But what happened was,
My mind initially was trying to protect me by placing the blame on the other dog,
When in reality,
It was actions that I did that hurt my dog.
That was such a hard pill to swallow.
I cried and cried from my gut.
Not from guilt,
But from despair.
Because I saw how I myself caused another being pain and trauma.
So after a few days,
I asked myself,
Why did I need to know the truth?
Why did I have to have that reality brought into my psyche?
Like really,
What good did that do for me?
And right away,
The word compassion showed up in my mind.
I needed to know the truth so that I could show myself compassion,
And in turn,
Show others compassion.
Because one of the areas I notice that I judge people is how they treat their dogs.
I almost shame them for feeding them so much that they're overweight,
Or shaming them for pulling the dog on their leash when they're taking them for a walk.
And honestly,
I wasn't even shaming them.
Now I see my mind was just projecting the shame that was unconscious in me onto the outside world by shaming others.
So now,
When I see dogs being treated in ways that aren't always so great,
Instead of judging them,
I have compassion for that dog owner because I know that they're really trying their best.
It's amazing what the mind will do to protect us from our own pain.
Honestly,
More than ever,
I see it as a gift.
And I see why people don't want to get into this deeper healing realm,
Because it does come with sharp realities that we really wish were not true.
But if we can see ourselves clearly and have compassion for ourselves,
That means we can have compassion for others.
And learning to not judge others is a byproduct of that compassion.
So I just want to share this in case it gives anyone else the courage to stop pointing the finger outside and start looking more inside,
And see what lies we are telling ourselves in order to protect ourselves from the truth.
Because it really is true.
Where the darkness is,
Is where your own freedom lies.
