Some great thinkers,
Some really good philosophers believe that the ultimate anxiety that is the root cause of all other anxieties is the fear of death.
If we can overcome that fear and become at ease with the idea of dying,
Then all other anxieties in effect will be reduced.
Death is a topic that many of us don't want to look at because it can be quite terrifying.
But the reason why it's quite terrifying is because we don't look at it,
As we know that the things that we avoid often become worse and anxiety that we have aversion to is maintained.
So the first step in dealing with any kind of anxiety,
Death included,
Is to sit with it,
To be with it,
To familiarize ourselves with it.
Meditation can be translated actually as familiarization,
To be with something,
Emotions or an object,
Over and over and over again.
So let's start right now and take a big picture of your life.
Think of the details that make you you.
Friends,
Lack of friends,
Family members or lack of family members,
Work or lack of work,
Passions or lack of passions,
Good habits and bad habits,
Dreams,
Aspirations,
Things that cause you stress,
Things that cause you pleasure,
Ways that you are lazy,
Ways that you procrastinate,
Ways that you get stuff done,
Talents and gifts that you have,
Memories that you haven't really thought of in years,
Little details from the house you grew up in,
Foods that you love,
Foods that you dislike.
All of these details make you you and when you die they will all be thrown ceaselessly into oblivion.
And even if you spent every day with someone for your entire life,
They would not really know what it's like to be you that is a gift and a privilege only you have.
But it will go and your true unique story will go too.
Imagine that you only have 10 years to live now.
How would you spend the next 10 years?
Would you do anything differently?
Would you be afraid of the approaching death in 10 years?
Sit with that idea now and just try and be mindful of the breath as you contemplate your death in 10 years from now.
Of course,
Death can happen anytime.
We have to live,
Of course,
As if we will live a long life.
But what we know from reality is that people die unexpectedly all of the time.
That is the nature of tragedy and suffering.
And life is rife with suffering.
So it would not be that unusual statistically for you to die within the next year.
You have to die at some point.
Why would it not be in the next year?
Many people have freak accidents or car crashes.
I suspect that you are living a wise life to some degree and that the likelihood of you getting killed is small,
But it's not impossible.
And how would that make you feel to think that you could die one year from now?
How would you spend the next year?
What would you change?
What would you keep the same?
Let's increase the intensity of this visualization a little bit.
We've looked at what it would be like if you died in 10 years and then a year.
Let's think about you dying now by the end of today.
You have one day left.
Think about the stresses,
The things that cause you anxiety.
What are they like to you knowing that your life will completely disappear and evaporate into the vast ocean of unexplored existence?
You have one day left.
Are you happy about the life that you've lived so far?
Would you live today differently knowing you have one day left?
Let's go even further.
Imagine now you have actually died and you look down on your body and you see it starting to decay as all animals' bodies will decay.
Our bodies are made of flesh and blood and bone and when there is no pulse,
No life,
They will degrade into the earth.
Bones will turn to dust and be blown away in the wind.
Why would you see your own body any different from the body of a dead mouse on the road?
How do you feel looking down at your body?
Does it cause you grief,
Anxiety?
Are you able to be calm looking at it,
Slowly decomposing?
It's not actually a morbid thought,
It's nature.
And is nature morbid or is it just nature,
Just the way of things?
How do you feel looking down at your body?
Does it cause you grief,
Anxiety?
Is it just nature,
Just the way of things?
Finally,
Let's spend a little bit of time thinking about death as being identical to the way things were before we were born.
Try and picture this state of non-existence in your mind.
Try to go back before you were born.
How did you feel then?
Were you afraid?
Were you unhappy?
And if not,
Why would you be about the end of life as you now know it?
Understandable Before we end the visualization,
I'd like you to fill your heart with some love.
Think of someone in your life who you have an easy relationship with,
Who getting along with is not difficult.
It could be someone from your past even.
It could be someone that you have only seen on TV or on YouTube,
But just someone that you like and you feel warm feelings towards.
You feel warm feelings towards and just wish them well in your heart.
Just really wish them to be happy and to be successful and healthy and safe.
Just like you would wish your own newborn,
Your own innocent,
Beautiful,
Perfect,
Fragile newborn to be well.
Wish this person well.
How beautiful it is to be able to give that gift of well wishing to another human being.
That is the power of love.
It's always important to try and mix in compassion with some of the more difficult work we do on anxiety.
The opposite side of death is love,
Actually,
Not life.
And that is a truth that you need to figure out on your own.
